I am so very sorry. Man, that has got to hurt.

Sounds like what I do with food, so I definately can't judge.

you ever thought of gamblers anonymous?

That sucks. We have a casino in our area and I have gone also, to get out of the house. I never walked out of there with more than I came in with. Nor did I ever leave "happy".

sorry to hear,learn from your mistake and try not to do it again

The state of mind of not caring is what is scary and dangerous. And it's something I fight as well. The first step is to decide your life is worth fighting for. And then you decide to get help through resouces such as gamblers anonymous, medication, and therapy.

I was married for 20 years, the last 5 years of my marriage were really rough things were really falling apart. During that time frame my ex-wife started and I started gambling. The only time we would get along was when we were out of the house. And that's how it started, we racked up some serious bills and got really stuck so anyway I had a building lot in florida that I had brought for $2500 years ago when I was young and was saving for my kids. I sold it for $65,000 cleared all our debt and we started doing repairs on our house. But what happened we started going back to the casinos and blew the rest of the money and put us back in debt again. So then we refinanced the house and took out $70,000 in equity. What do you think we did with the money after we cleared our debts again? Yes we went back to the casino and blew it all again. after all our money was gone we divorced a bitter divorce at that and stopped speaking to one another for several years. In the mean time I was forced into bankruptcy because I couldn't afford to make it on my own with all the debt I was carrying. And I still gambled for another year after our divorce. Finally I stopped cold turkey. And stayed clean for six or seven years. So what happens our friendship rekindles over our two kids. So what happens my ex gets really sick with pneumonia and is hospitalized. When she gets out she borrows a $1000 against her retirement. to catch up on her bills. Instead of paying them she calls me and asks me if I would give her a ride to the casino. She only is going with a $100 a agree and we go she ends up withdrawing the whole $1000 and blowing it all. In the mean time I have no urge to gamble I feel ok with myself. But on the way home she lends me her rewards card because she probably won't have time to go back again in the near future. big mistake on my part taking it. I do go back on my own and lose the bonus money right away. After that I can't stop myself I start withdrawing money and I keep withdrawing until I am broke about $1200 now I can't pay my rent. I am in panic mode I end up lying to my landlord and tell him my car broke down and ask him if I can pay the back rent in payments. I am lucky I have been here along time and this is the first time I have been late with the rent. He says ok. I am still paying off the back rent as I write this. I just can't be in the casino It is just the way it is for me. I thought I could handle myself after being clean for several years but now I know I can't. Moral of this story no matter how bored or depressed you may be you need to find something else to do with your time then spend it at the casino. Trust me on this, I hope you feel better johhnyboy1960