Depression Support Group
Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.
hi guys.
i haven't posted here in a while.
i'm just so sad right now it hurts. i don't want to sleep but i should because its 3 AM. I feel so anxious / sad, i don't know what to do with myself. And I hate that I have to be this way while most other people are enjoying life.
I feel that this elusive, but very real to me, condition just continues to tourture me, hold me back, not let me do the things i want to do. not let me hold a job, not let me enjoy activities. not let me do anything.
i feel soooo alone.
my sweet dog is 15-- who knows how long she will have.
I hate this feeling so much, and i cant get away from it for more than short moments.
i'm getting older and older and older, and what is the defining story of my life?-- depression. and i hate that so much.
i feel like everything is so empty and fleeting, and it makes me soo sad, and I feel sooo alone with these feelings, and in the end it seems i will die with this feeling, and that sucks so much because i thought i had so much potential.
i've been studying computer science for about 4 years now, and i'm beginning to feel like i just want to quit. i quit so many things, and i feel like quitting again because i fee like nothing gets better.
i am just so damn sad and alone and empty.
i haven't posted here in a while.
i'm just so sad right now it hurts. i don't want to sleep but i should because its 3 AM. I feel so anxious / sad, i don't know what to do with myself. And I hate that I have to be this way while most other people are enjoying life.
I feel that this elusive, but very real to me, condition just continues to tourture me, hold me back, not let me do the things i want to do. not let me hold a job, not let me enjoy activities. not let me do anything.
i feel soooo alone.
my sweet dog is 15-- who knows how long she will have.
I hate this feeling so much, and i cant get away from it for more than short moments.
i'm getting older and older and older, and what is the defining story of my life?-- depression. and i hate that so much.
i feel like everything is so empty and fleeting, and it makes me soo sad, and I feel sooo alone with these feelings, and in the end it seems i will die with this feeling, and that sucks so much because i thought i had so much potential.
i've been studying computer science for about 4 years now, and i'm beginning to feel like i just want to quit. i quit so many things, and i feel like quitting again because i fee like nothing gets better.
i am just so damn sad and alone and empty.
Please Don't Give Up.
(((((((((HUGS))))))))
"I hate that I have to be this way while most other people are enjoying life. "
You dont have to be that way , you can get better as long as you try
you must already know the sources that makes you feel so sad like that , you should fight them , you can start to enjoy life but first you need to clean up your interior .
you know what I could get from your post ??
that you are willing to change but at the same time you blame yourself , blaming yourself will only make things worse , instead of blaming you should focus on overcoming the problems .
if negativity is a big issue for you , fight it with positivity and hang on to positive thought as much as you can
You can start to build a new world inside of you
but you have to believe in yourself , try and persist
never blaming yourself for the failures or time lost
everyday you have opportunities to start to build this new life
youre letting the past cuff you into chains that dont let you get out of that bad life
break those chains , look for the answers and solutions you need , theyre right there inside of you but u nedd to make efforts to get to them and then put them into practice .
" and in the end it seems i will die with this feeling, and that sucks so much because i thought i had so much potential. "
Youll only die with that feeling if you keep leting it holding you down , make an effort and get up !
and about potential , you still have a lotta potential much more than you think , if you think you dont anymore its because you let your weaknesses make you blind and forget how much strength you have .
I know you can do it
but now you gotta believe , not only in me but mostly in yourself !
take care and think about what I said okay :)
First of all, you NEED sleep. Sleep deprivation will greatly worsen both physical and mental illness. Sleep deprivation will intensify a bad mood, and it will worsen already poor concentration, among other horrible things; it will make your life HELL, as I know. If you have an underlying physical illness that you don't know about and then you become severely sleep deprived, it can worsen by up to 5784 x's, and it did. I'm sorry about making such a big deal about this but Please! try to sleep. Ask your doctor for anxiety and/or sleep medication if necessary; it helps a lot of people.
If the age on your profile is correct, you are definitely NOT old. You still have plenty of time. I've heard of people almost twice your age going back to school.
My cousin is studying either computer science or a similar field, and he's about to get his masters soon. He had some problems with his physical health, so he took a year off of school; but, if he gave up with this setback, he wouldn't have made it this far. You don't necessarily have give up and quit pursing your degree, but you can rest and take a semester or two off. Mainly because of my physical health (and somewhat mental,) I have to put off college for a semester or two. You can work on your health and getting better, and then you can worry about school afterwards.
I don't know what degree you're pursing, but you either got or are about to receive your bachelors. You've done so much, and you can't let your hard work be for nothing. You'll never get where you want to be if you quit. Ultimately, it's your choice, and you need to choose whatever you think is best for you.
By the way, are you seeking any treatment for depression/anxiety such as medication and/or counseling? I'm extremely treatment resistant. Medication has helped to pull me out of some really dark places, but then they seem to wear off after a week. That's just me, though; I think most other people experience longer relief than I do. There are studies that show that counseling can be just as effective as taking antidepressants. I don't want to get into counseling because my depression is 91% biological.
There are many promising treatments for depression. They have ECT and vagus nerve stimulation. They also have something where they drill holes into your head and put electrodes in there. I DO NOT want that done. I wouldn't mind having transcranial magnetic stimulation done. Supposedly, it has little to no side effects. These are mainly for treatment resistant depression.
I just wanted to say that you will feel better. You're not going to be like this forever. I've been severely depressed since around my 11th birthday and almost 7 years later my mood is kind of stable. I've experienced the lowest of lows, and this is a significant improvement. I always felt the same way you did, and I didn't think my mood would ever improved. I'll bet that you'll be as shocked as I was when I actually started to feel better. You wait and see!
Hugs
I think if you can stick it out you shouldn't quit studying. You have 4 years in and that is a huge accomplishment. You should feel very proud of that!! Studying can help distract us for awhile from our sad feelings.,while working towards a good goal.
(((HUGS)))