I'm sorry you find yourself in that fog of uncertainty and questioning what's next. I too find myself in that state of mind and am reminded that it is okay to not know our next move at the moment. It is also okay to take that as a chance to catch a breath and enjoy the fact that we are in control of our struggles as well as our thoughts in planning our future with hope and promise. Don't see it as running out of time, but instead that this IS your time. Give your mind a chance to reset and reenergize, feeling better now is the key to seeing things in a clear setting moving forward. Much hope for a great day.

Anyone can learn things through relationship and it’s not just about other person but also one’ self. Through this relationship, you now know more clearly what you want and what you don’t want for yourself and from others and next time when you meet someone new, you will, at least be able to tell (without investing too much time) whether they have similar trait (red flag) to ones you have dated before but fall through. Having said that, meeting wrong person for you is one thing but you attracting them or you become attracted to them is another. When you yourself are not in a right place (physically, emotionally etc..) , you can actually attract wrong people to you. You need to feel good being by yourself, get in touch with your inner-self and be one. You need to be able to self-love/care, be able to nurture yourself and when you feel whole, you will be able to see whether others have it in them or not. So try not to enter into another relationship when you are not feeling whole as it will highly likely bring another trouble. Try learning about mediation and deep breathing technique, it can help with anxiety and clear/focus the mind. Stay away from alcohol/drug as it will only leads you to another destructive path, instead find other way to release the stress/energy (if feeling restless) and relax. Start exploring and searching for other options and you may find ones that works for you. (different kind of exercise, visiting place, hobbies/interest, renovating/decorating, shake things up and change repetitive pattern to bring little changes into your life). Whenever your thoughts start spiralling downwards, just be aware that it is your mind that is taking you there, NOT that your actual life/your physical body is in danger. Try to snap yourself out of that tunnel vision and see the bigger picture and understand that what you are going through it just a one chapter of your life NOT your entire life. Get in touch with your inner-self and focus on yourself, what makes you happy/satisfied/at peace? Find your inner child and nourish yourself.

At least you're GOING to the gym to push yourself physically! Be proud of that! Exercise, especially cardio, bicycling, has been great for me as far as elevating my depression and reducing my anxiety. It levels me out. Exercise, followed by sleep, deep sleep, is the ultimate in self care.

Lyfesclinch,
I am trying to just BE in the moment and take things as they happen. I still do not know what direction to move in and hoping this decision will come in time.

Obvious, I learned that I can't control the outcomes of situations. Sometimes you just have to let things happen and BE as the Universe intends them. It's just, everytime I learn these lessons, I feel it takes a lot of me. The other person goes on their Merry Way and I'm left to pick up the pieces.

Koolman, Yes, the gym has been a good source of therapy for me. But, now I'm finding that things that need to be done at home are being left at the wayside. Tonight, the gym is off the table, I've got counseling and I need to really give the house a good cleaning.

A change of scene can help a lot. I'm sorry you are going thru this and feel so alone. You are right and strong tho to not put up with being treated wrong. Keep looking to the better future, it will get better. Breathe in deep and get outside to get some sun and go barefoot to get grounded. Pray and listen to positive things, avoid news and negativity. Call friends that are positive too. <3

Drinking or drugs is never the answer to problems that disturb you mentally. The best thing to do, is keep working out, but also make time for just you, and do what you think is best in the time.