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FAILURE AS A MOM...

lonelyinNY
lonelyinNY
WELL TODAY I HAD A MEETING AT MY SONS SCHOOL TO SEE IF HE WILL GRADUATE THIS YEAR.MY SON ABSOLUTELY HATES SCHOOL BECAUSE HE HAS GREAT PROBLEMS WITH READING AND WRITING.TO CONFIRM MY FEARS THEY SAID HE DOESNT HAVE ENOUGH CREDITS TO GRADUATE.THEY MIGHT AS WELL TOLD HIM TOO BAD GO HOME WITH YOUR MOM NOW.IT WAS A VERY DUMB MEETING WITH SNOBS WHO DONT KNOW WHATS REALLY GOING ON .THEY HAVE HAD FOUR YEARS TO FIGURE OUT HIS CREDITS AND WHEN ITS TO LATE ,ITS TO BAD SO SAD SHIT! I DROVE HOME IN TEARS BECAUSE I FELT LIKE SUCH A FAILURE TO MY SON.I BLAME MYSELF FOR NEVER REALLY HAVING TIME TO HELP HIM.I ALWAYS HAD TO WORK TO TAKE CARE OF EVERYONE.MY JOBS WERE DEMANDING AND AT NIGHT SO I NEVER HAD THE TIME OR ENERGY TO WORK ON HIS READING AND OTHER SCHOOLING.HIS FATHER NEVER LEARNED TO READ AND WRITE AND HAS LOOKED TO ME ALL THESE YEARS TO TAKE CARE OF EVERYTHING.......I FEEL THE WEIGHT OF THE WORLD CRUSHING ME......MY SON REALLY WANTS A JOB CLEANING FACTORIES AND I AM GONNA HELP HIM GET IN ANY WAY I CAN.AT THIS POINT I AM GONNA LOOK INTO IF I CAN HOME SCHOOL HIM,I HAVE NO IDEA WHERE TO START BUT HE REALLY NEEDS A DIPLOMA.LIFE IS HARD ENOUGH WITH ONE LET ALONE NOT HAVING ONE.I HAVE THREE OTHER KIDS AND I HOPE I HAVE NOT FAILED THEM AS WELL.I HAVE ALWAYS WORKED HARD FOR MY KIDS TO HAVE A GOOD LIFE AND I GAVE UP THE SPECIAL TIME I SHOULD HAVE BEEN THERE MORE FOR THIER EDUCATION.WHAT RESPONCIBILITY DOES THE SCHOOL SYSTEMS ACCOUNT FOR???????SHOULDNT PARENTS BE ABLE TO WORK GUILT FREE TO TAKE CARE OF THIER FAMILY NEEDS AND LEAVE THIER EDUCATIONS TO THE TEACHERS AND SCHOOLS??????NO IT SEEMS THE KIDS BRING MORE AND MORE SCHOOL WORK HOME TO BE DONE AT NIGHT.WHAT ARE THEY DOING IN SCHOOL????WHAT HAPPENENS TO ALL THE KIDS WHO DONT HAVE SOMEONE AT HOME NIGHTS TO HELP????I AM SO STRESSED AND SAD I TELL EVERYONE TO LOOK AHEAD NOT BACK BUT SO MUCH FOR MY OWN ADVICE I WISH I COULD START OVER AND BE A BETTER MOM.......
Friend19
Friend19
Home schooling would be a good option for him, and their are a lot of programs that can help you out. Like tutors that come in every once in a while to check on him and help with any areas you are having trouble teaching to him. Traditional schooling doesn't work for everyone. A lot of my family has learning problems including myself and even though I struggled through a normal public school, most of my family resorted to homeschooling. They also have online schools that may help, I think they are free to you just like a public school.
DonnaB49
DonnaB49
Don't blame yourself, I was a latchkey kid, my mom raised two kids while holding down a job. I know she did the best she could. I hated school too, a lot of teachers are over burdened and don't have the time for kids that are falling behind. He can always get a GED, look into your options.
deleted_user
deleted_user
I think that you are a good mom. Your son and other kids have a mother that is genuinely concerned for them and their future. I too was a latchkey kid as was my sister. My mom provided for us and worked several jobs to do so. She came home late and exhausted and our education also fell behind. My sister is a stay at home mom now, raising two great kids and has a hard working/ loving husband. I have problems, but not from anything that my mother did wrong. She cared for us so much, that she could not see past the "providing" aspect of raising us. I don't talk much to my sister anymore because the years and miles have separated us, but I guarantee that neither she nor I would ever blame mom for doing the best that she could to raise us right. Please stay strong and confident in your decisions. I know that raising kids is a difficult and thankless job many days, but with your love and guidance I feel that you will likely instill confidence in them to make you proud and endure the rough times ahead. I only blame myself these days, for not telling my mother more often what a great and strong woman she was.

Best wishes
deleted_user
deleted_user
Hun, the same thing happened to me. I dropped out in senior year because they lost one of my math credits and I have a math learning disibility. They told me I wouldn't graduate with my class. It wasn't my mom's fault and I never blamed her for leaving high school. It is not your fault, the school should have sent letters or something to you telling you he was low on credits. Can he finish HS by doing summer school? It's not too late for him, I am 28 and still struggling to get my GED. Encourage him to take classes so he can graduate within the next few years. Don't beat yourself up too much, I can tell by your post that you ARE a good mom and worked hard to privide for your children! Hugs xo
deleted_user
deleted_user
How many credits does he need? It may be easier on him to just go one more year than it would be to homeschool as homeschooling even over the computer involves a LOT MORE reading and writing than sitting in classes with a teacher talking... and realistically, how will you have the time and energy to do that? Besides, he's not a little boy, he's ye about a grown man. He can take on a little responsibility for his own education... he's supposed to. You can't study for him, can't read for him, can't test for him... he has to do the school work himself, earn those credits his self. If his problem is mainly reading and writing, check into a literacy program at the public library, maybe that is something daddy and him can do that together? I think that literacy thing would look for learning disabilities and such so they would know how to approach the learning process... he may need to learn from a different angle than the schools teach.
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