Im not ever going to be able to go to school. I cannot afford to go to counseling anymore. I need yet another job but with all of this pain i do not know how i am going to be able to do that. i have a hard time just sitting here at home. i cant do it. everything is just falling around me. The stock market omg my financial advisor told me yesterday that i might not be able to have my house that we are buying next month. I want normal so bad. I want to be able to go to work with the kids and be a happy person. not someone in pain. then on top of going to school full time i need yet another job on the weekends. i feel so stretched out and crying is just my only release. My husband doesnt help he keeps yelling at me. Im throwing up again and all he does is bring his sister over and he is a medic but he keeps asking if i want a phenergan shot everytime i puke. nothing is right. he says i need another job and i need to go to school. im sorry some days i just have so much pain i cannot get out of bed. like this morning i felt so ill when i woke up. im just scared i want this all fixed now.