I've had a bit of a break from therapy, somewhat accidently. My psych books quickly and it's easy to fall into a three week backlog (it doesn't help when you have to cancel and appointment twice because things keep popping up.) So it's been almost two months since therapy, and I am due the first Monday of May. Idle hands being what they are, and the blow up of my last friendship, found me starting to look up chronic depression. It's hard to tell people that you don't feel well, and it's even harder to explain to people that I can laugh one minute and then wham a single thought can bring me to my knees. I often feel like a pretender or fake because i feel miserable and yet I cannot complain of all the horrors that major depressive episodes share. I function, I pull myself out of bed, get dressed, leave the house, behave semi-normally get home, lock myself in a room, and then sleep, repeat. I have trouble sleeping, but not as I used to when my anxiety acted up. I just feel lethargic, zapped of all energy, and disengaged from my own life. So when I read the description of Dysthymia I felt like, behold and answer, poor self esteem, issues with sleep, ruminations of past guilt , and lack of energy (we have a winner).
My therapist has never told me my diagnosis, and i think he is reluctant to attach a label, because well exhibit A me looking it up on webmd.
So I wanted to ask other who have suffered from chronic recurring depression. What kind of treatments have you undergone? and what was the most helpful to you?