Hi River, like your fox avatar. I'm glad you got a vacation. Did something happen on the vacation to trigger depression. I had OCD for twelve years and going in public and new places was scariest, no control over the different environment.

Mine went away at 24 after my first child was born, ebbed away. Still have vestiges but nothing noticeable or interfering. I was blessed, but depression, that's another matter and still have other anxiety disorders.

Peace to you.

Thanks I like your avatar too. Nothing happened really. I was fine the first day, had a very nice time the second, then yesterday we went to visit my friend's family for a couple of hours and it hit me. I was trying so hard not to cry. We all went out to a restaurant and I couldnt even eat. We were playing slot machines and all I kept thinking of was that I wanted the evening to end. My friend and I had a huge fight because we are supposed to go to his family's for dinner and I want to stay at the hotel while he goes. I know I will be miserable if I go and why make everyone else miserable. I just want to cry but my friend is in the room with me and I can't.

He doesn't sound understanding. Maybe he usually is?

He doesn't understand my depression. People act like if I just tried not to be depressed everything would be ok.

I saw a great quote today concerning depression, it said, "If I had cancer, would you tell me to just get over it?"

I've been remarried 17 years to someone who is understanding. Ex husband could barely make it through my postpartum depression. I wish him and his new life well, however.

Being in the support group here is especially crucial if our close friends and families are ambivalent.

That is s good quote and I'm glad your spouse is understanding of your depression.

Hey River, don't feel guilty about your depression. Unfortunately we take depression with us wherever we go. I'm sorry that He does not understand about your illness. Could you explain it some?
In my case, my husband still doesn't really have a clue about my Depress/Anxiety., but he tries.
Let us know how things are going, We care!
Susu

He knows. He just doesn't understand. I feel so alone.

Aww, I'm sorry.

Don't be afraid. You are on a vacation which is great. Change is good. Although scary it can really be a good thing especially when it is needed.

Try not to get lost in your own head and smell the air. Enjoy life.

Sometimes, it is about doing what is necessary to keep you even keeled.. I am truly sorry to hear that he doesn't understand and it led to a blow up. But ultimately, you have to do what your emotions will allow at the time. As a sufferer of social anxieties, having the ability to forsee the anxieties before placed in a "unprotected" environment enables me to control my own anxiety attacks.