Depression Support Group
Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.
Hi,
So as far back as I can remember I have had issues with depression. 3 years old, not excited about a birthday to an independent adult that can't handle the basics of life who again, is depressed. This time its not environment based, new environment that I am controlling, however I feel out of control and that is making things so much harder. My anxiety doubles with the situation making me unable to do basic tasks so I don't do them and that adds to the already present depression who didn't want to do the task in the first place. Im going to start medication, but I feel like a failure in my relationship where my partner is suffering from my lack of will to take care of myself and asserted his relationship boundry that I basically had to get my shit together because he lives here too. Whether it be dishes or showering or eating well, everything is overwhelming. I take out the trash which should be easy but the bag rips so I overwhelmingly take it out only to have some trash stuck to the bottom of the bin, so I am unable to put a bag back in the trash can because I associate it with the rip, so I leave it alone and then feel disgusted with myself for not being able to do the basics and I get more depressed. And dishes are the worst. I feel like a basket case and cant understand how people can do so much in a day, cook, work, clean, self-care, pay bills, house problems, family or friends. Im just very tired all the time and I dont know how to function at this point.
The only thing that has ever helped me is to break tasks down into tiny, micro steps. Sometimes so small as, putting my feet on the floor, then stand up, then walk to the kitchen, then pour a glass of water, etc...til I finally end up in the shower. Eventually, one small step leads to the next, and it's super important to celebrate each step - no step you take right now is too small.
It may be hard for other folks who don't suffer with depression, maybe like your boyfriend to really understand how hard these tasks become, so maybe bring him to a PCP appointment, or therapy session to get some back up if you need it.
Hang in there...nothing lasts forever, including depression.
Sending you peace.
are there any chores you like or prefer or find easier than others? If you hate dishes, maybe you could just stick to trash. For some reason my easiest to do chores when I am depressed is taking out the trash and vacuuming. The nice thing about those is one takes me outside and they both make things look significantly better with not much work
Maybe you could discuss a chore schedule with your partner if you are up to it and you would just do certain things and not others but I guess that might be too much pressure.
sorry you are struggling so much right now. it is hard to keep up with all the daily living things when you are feeling so down.