Depression Support Group

Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.

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can't stop thinking about an ex

fghi
fghi
I am going through postpartum depression.In this postpartum period,I suddenly miss my ex.It has been 15 yrs since we spoke to each other. I miss himlike crazy.I feel regrets of not telling him how much I loved him and for letting him go. I am now married to another man and he is married too. .But in my mind,i am obsessing about him and want him back. I'm in therapy but I still can't get over missing him. The reality is he moved on too fast and not worth the sadness. Should I just contact him to say hello or how do I get over my sadness of missing him .I can't concentrate on anything else.Any comment is appreciated.
chilvr
chilvr
sounds like obsessive thoughts to me. i get them often about many things including my ex. do something to get your mind off of them, even if it is only telling yourself over and over not to think about it. i find that reading a book or watching something engrossing on tv helps me, as does taking a xanax..lol.
don't contact him, it's been 15 years and you don't really want him back in your life. contact will only make it worse.
hugs and puppy kisses
solitaryorchid
solitaryorchid
I've struggled with obsessive thoughts before. When I try to not think about it, I usually just end up thinking about it even more. My therapist taught me that when I can accept the thoughts without judgment, fear, or condemnation that that is when I can move on from them. Sometimes I have to do that many times an hour but it does help the thought go away at least for a little while.
blackhawkdown
blackhawkdown
My opinion is NO do NOT call him. He is married as are you and you have no idea what his relationship is like. He could have a great one or suspicious one and if his wife answers the phone think of the impossible situation/ position you just put him in.!! An accidental meeting on the street or in a store is ok but to call him could possibly be disastrous. You are playing with a hand grenade and if it goes off you wont be sure who will get hurt besides yourself. .