I'm sure you have the same fears and concerns that many of us have. For the most part I am honest about how I am feeling and what I am dealing with that day. When I pass someone when I'm walking Anny and they ask how I'm doing, I just tell them that I'm still upright. I don't want to lie, yet I also don't want to share my problems with every Tom Dick and Harry that I meet along the way. What I am truly glad to hear is that you have an understanding husband. Many people aren't that fortunate. I think as long as you sit down with him at least once a week or so and tell him exactly what is going on with you, and at the same time, ask him how HE is doing, then your line of communication will stay strong and so will your relationship. I bought a book for myself called Fibromyalgia for Dummies and it has been a lot of help to me and can be a lot of help to those who read it. I wonder now if they have one on depression. The hardest thing we have to deal with, is being around people that have never had depression or don't care to understand. That is why I also say that I feel so blessed to have all of you on DS. Hugs GB

try to look at it this way; are they all perfect and happy all the time? are they a burden to you? y, i'm sure its a hassle to them as much as it is a hassle to us but that's what family is about; loving each other regardless of our shortcomings :D

however, with other people in our lives there probably are quiet a few that smile and think we're just lazy or immature but who cares about them?

I often feel like this. With my boyfriend. I know he thinks I need to suck it up but like you said it's not something that goes away in minutes or days. Same with my mom, you think she would know she is a retired nurse. She doesn't realize that I ve kept this in long enough. It could be negative self talk but it truly states how you feel about the situation. Don't minimize and tell yourself it's not that terrible cause you know it is. Maybe not compared to others but it is still there. It is not something we can just suck up.
It's not good for us to keep it in or a secret from our loved ones, this Iknow too, but its hard to keep bothering them with the same old stuff. Your not alone in this, and not sure how we go about it but keep plgging away at it and hope for the best.

I don't think I've ever felt like a burden, but my family certainly showed me how little they cared for me. I haven't spoken to any of them in years.

Yes I feel like I'm a burden to my family to. My husband is the best at understanding but I still feel so bad because he carries all the weight of responsibility. I have chronic pain, depression, PTSD, and Anxiety. A lot to ask anyone to deal with.
But if someone really likes you they don't seem to mind. And I have to remind myself that I would do the same thing for them if they were in my position.
I try to Do special little things to show them how much I love and appreciate them.
Love overshadows Burden

Yes I feel they same way. Although both my parents have depression and suicidal thoughts. I know that my friends and hubby do look at me and think just get over yourself already....that hurts.

I do feel bad that I can't control the way I feel. I do know that it makes hubby feel inadequate. Is it negative self talk? Perhaps. For me I know its accurate.

That's wny I come here. To talk to people who get it. Then I don't have to beg for real people in my life to care about me.

Sorry don't think that I was much help.

YES, i feel that way a lot. My children have even told me how much they resent me being a different kind of grandma. They cant count on how im doing that day to plan ahead for babysitting.

Im sorry, theres no answer for me. I was suicidal in September, got ready to kill myself twice in one day. Im alone mostly, no one would have noticed except my mom when i didnt call her that night. I couldnt do it, so tore up my note and put everything away.

Never told anyone for a week, then told my oldest. The girls were floored. They cried, and got all upset, then said they wanted me around, just as i am. Being here and mentally ill, is much better than losing me completely. So theres been less pressure, although the more stable I am, the more they ratchet up their expectations.

Thanx for all your replies and show of support. It does help to know that i can come on here and others will understand my language and where im coming from and i wont have to worry about burdening them

Yes I feel like they are tired of my problems. Especially my husband. He just wants it to all be fine. Face it their lives would be much better if we didn't add all this unhappiness and misery of ours to it.
Plus I feel so shitty most of the time that to give back positively can be really difficult. Everyone's heard that advice to cut negative people out of your life. Well, ummm that's pretty much me. If I honestly answer someone's enquiry into how I'm doing, it's a downer for the most part. Plus the negative language in our minds leaks out in our commentary of the day.
I also find my family a burden though so I guess it equals out!
I have a daughter that has stressed me out with her drama for 15 years now.My husband can be very negative and drives me nuts. In fact I think he has contributed greatly to my depression because of his negativity (which he doesn't think he has). I'd like to record all his comments from a day to play back to him.
I spent the day with him and my grandson today at a zoo. It should've been a great time. I hated his company. I truly hated his company. How awful is that. Just his nit picking comments and negative body language makes it 10 times more difficult for me who is currently really working at being positive. Anyway, I am off topic.