Hello,
I’m so sorry to hear you are suffering. I understand the pain you are going through as I myself am going through a tough time. I pray that since there is so much awareness out there now they will come up with a breakthrough to end our suffering. Just know there are people here that understand exactly what you are going through and want to help as much as we can.

Sorry to hear about how you are feeling. Many of us have lived that life and know from where you stand or in this case type. My depression became so bad that I couldn't get out of bed and I ended being hospitalized several times. So those here know.

Why are you having a hard time now? What is driving that?

I was divorced about 15 months ago. Wife basically told me she never loved me. I was the easygoing guy who wanted a family and she apparently just wanted kids. As soon as the kids were born she wanted nothing to do with me. She acted while dating that she loved me and we married. Then kids come and I couldn't get a hello out of her for years. Then she actually told me she never thought we were right for each other. Now, maybe I should have known better but I really thought she loved me. Anyhow, because I'm an anxious and depressive guy I worry about our 9 year old twin girls who are now in therapy. I miss soo much the idea of family, I mean, I would have done anything to work it out. I beat myself up daily that I should have found a way to make it work. I cry for my kids as I hope this will not harm them. I think the holidays really hit it home that your alone. Everybody tells me "you'll find the right person to make you happy. They don't get it. I need time to try to let this settle and because I'm an anxious guy not let this hold me back if and when ever want to date. I hope they invent the magic pill sometime soon. I;m exhausted from all the pain.

Sorry to hear this. I'm likely to be on my way to separation. I'm an anxious person as well and always over think things. It hurts me to think how financially bad I will be and I know it will bother me a lot when she moves on to someone else. The thought of my kids being with a step dad doesn't sit well either. I find meds help during the time of low stress but when I have high stress it doesn't matter what I do nothing seems to lower my stress until the situation is done. Usually I end up either giving in to the situation or avoiding it all together to bring my anxiety back down. I guess what I'm trying to say is I totally know what you are feeling. Sometimes it good to hear your not alone in how you feel. Take care.

Nate, I agree with you on the meds. In really trying times you need something like Xanax to help. My regular meds don't help much when I'm really off the rails. What helps me the best is talking about it. I started to drink heavy to numb the pain but that's all that does. You wake up the next day with the same pain. I'm trying to let go of things I can't control. If my ex dates and remarries there is really nothing I can do. I hope she doesn't but if she does I will have to learn to deal with it and how it affects my kids. Conversely If I ever got married again it would be similar on the kids. But I get it. Right now I have my kids in therapy just dealing with the all the change and it had been hard on them and just breaks my heart. I hear you on the finances also. I am trying to get myself to understand that it is out of my control also. There will be more hard times to come. Please keep posting and sharing as so many people on here have been through what your going through.

Sounds like you are taking good steps to take care of yourself. It took me several years to find the right combo of meds to deal with my anxiety/depression after a divorce. I have a wonderful doctor and counselor now and I feel great. I know that in time you will feel better, too.