Depression Support Group

Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.

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SeekingKnowledge 04/14/2007

Ok - Wonder if other newly single people out there feel the same way.

I finally got my taxes done (which anyone who's read my journal the last couple days totally knows was not an easy task for me!), and low and behold - I'm getting a refund!!!! YIppie!!!!

That being said - I've always been use to sitting down with my X and discussing what we were going to do with the money, etc., and now I sit here and am doing it alone. It's scary. I know, how lame - I get to be selfish and decide it on my own! Yet - I feel that I need the input as to what a sound decision is. I'm use to being able to discuss what to do, etc., and now it's all on me - and that overwhelms me. I know, most must think that makes absolutely no sense. Like - hey good for you that you don't have to share! LOL But, I'm second guessing myself as to what I should/need to do.

Just thinking out loud hehe. Thanks for listening! :)

deleted_user 04/14/2007

Save some for your retirement and treat yourself to something that YOU want within reason. Something that will make YOU feel good.

SeekingKnowledge 04/14/2007

Gemini you're right - I need to put some towards my retirement. I need to do that - as I need to count on myself....still a learning process!

bebu 04/14/2007

I am not recently single, but have been many times in the past (too many to count!!) I know the feeling of being overwhelmed - I get that too, and have been singe for over 2 years. The only thing that I can tell you is that when you have made a decision it is very empowering to have done it on your own - good luck!!

starfish 04/14/2007

I think that is really common with anyone who has lost a mate for whatever reason - I haven't made enough to get a return for --- I can't remember. But I think the standard rule I've heard on this is - pay down debt if you have it first, then save some for retirement if you don't already have a steady deposit for that, and then some for yourself. But I think it all depends on how much you're getting back, how big your debts are, how much you want/need for retirement, and how much you want/need for yourself. Yourself may need a little extra boost right now!!!

BeckyK 04/14/2007

Put some away, and got treat yourself to something you wouldn't normally do or buy for yourself! I am not single, but that is what we do. Also, we have in the past used it to pay off debt. That way we don't have a car payment, and our Credit Card is payed off, etc. It is nice to get rid of some bills! Make sure what ever you do that you save some for "fun money"!

ST0RM 04/14/2007

Bet it all on black; just kidding- I agree with the masses, do something special for yourself, maybe new threads or something for you and your kids that you can all enjoy. The fact is; all of does not have to be spent or even planned- if not sure where to unload your loot- hold on to it I'm sure life will find a home for those dead presidents.
Just a "penny for your thoughts."
STORM...

deleted_user 04/14/2007

I always save some, spend some on one home improvement and last always spend something on me now that m y kids are gone.
even if it is just a new hair pin. Making decisions alone are a challange but when you do it many times and the consequences are good it is empowering. you will make mistakes but so what. Just do what you want.

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