Depression Support Group
Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.
I've been reading this article and I just wanted to get some opinions from other people that are depressed on what they think about it. It's a bit of a long one so I don't expect everyone to read the whole thing but a few people might. It talks about the possible reasons that men commit suicide more often than women, as a person suffering from depression for years I've found that I can relate somewhat to this article. It talks about how we feel that as men we expect people to expect certain things from us and how feeling as though we've failed to live up to those expectations can lead to suicide. Personally I've found that part to be quite true, I feel at times like I've lost my "manhood" because I'm physically and mentally debilitated. I feel like at times that I'm not living up to the expectations that people assume of me just as part of adulthood/manhood.
http://www.psmag.com/health-and-behavior/why-men-kill-themselves-in-such-high-numbers
http://www.psmag.com/health-and-behavior/why-men-kill-themselves-in-such-high-numbers
I believe the only expectations anyone should live up to, are the ones we set for ourselves. That's actually what has helped me most in my journey towards better physical and mental health. I can't be what the world expects and I'm ok with that.
I have lots of theories about it. I have wondered all of the following at different times:
1. self pity is never expressed and therefore never expressed (ie sits and lurks)
2. the change in legislation around the world makes men much more vulnerable than they used to be, and more vulnerable than women in some situations; look at the legislation around sexual abuse, for instance. Or divorce issues.
3. Sons try to please their fathers. Often their fathers are total wankers.
4. sons stop talking to their mothers just when they need someone to believe in them most.
5. women's lib has broken the bonds of care in families; or at least made mothers so busy they don't have time to read between the lines.
6. Families aren't stable any more.
Young men need stability, but they also succumb to pressure easily too. They try to do what they think others want, to be men without being able to really clarify what is wanted of them. I am often telling my son to go easy on himself, and his father berates him to be tough. Well: his father was a jerk who couldn't keep his life together and can't save money on a six figure income. Maybe my son shouldn't take advice from him.
My son should take advice from me, who actually love him and want him to succeed AND be happy (not just succeed). But his culture won't let him open up to me.