Depression Support Group
Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.
So today I decided to explain my whole life to the world.
My mother had MS and a drinking disorder also smoked and my dad use to drink and smoke(he quit long ago). When my mother would drink she would be violent but she wasn't always drunk it was on and off. When she was though my dad and her would fight and yell at eachother. The scariest times that happen when she was drinking is she once grabbed a gun and bullets even tho the gun didn't work and she went on the porch and my dad was working outside that day, I ran after her and screamed to dad that she had a gun. He told her to put it down and she did so then I took it from her and she went inside. Another time was.... she tried to.... stab herself right in front of me and my father. He pulled the knife away without getting cut and she just got all mad and when back to the bedroom. After a little while of her drinking and stuff child protection services told me and dad that we had to move out. That was tough. We lived with couple of friends until we where able to get a apartment. One day we where talking to a lady from CPS and someone knocked on our door, dad open it I saw that it was the police, he stepped out side to talk to them a few min later he comes back crying saying that mom was dead, she had committed suicide. My already crumbling world was destroyed beyond repair. I lost my best friend. My mother was so enjoyable to be around when she wasn't drinking. I think I was in 4th or 3rd grade at that time. On that day depression became my world. It wasn't as severe at that time but as time went on it got worse and worse. Only recently have I taken meds for it. I'm in 8th grade now and 13. For so long I was struggling. And I still do so that's why I'm here.
I am not going to say that you will understand it when you get older, but suspect that you have heard that a lot.
In my experience, there are 2 main causes of depression: experiences we have had, and brain chemistry. Therapy can be very helpful in both cases, as can medication. But in my opinion (and I am not a health care professional), meds are mostly helpful when it is brain chemistry. Based on what you have said, it is the experience of your mother's suicide (an experience) that is the root of your depression.
Do you feel like you have come to terms with your mother's passing? There is no expected answer here, only the truth of how you feel. Coming to terms with something like that can take a lot of time. And therapy can really help.
You do not have to feel like you are being disrespectful of your mother's memory by "moving on".
I have lost both my parents and my sister, but I am 63 years old now and it is expected that I should have lost family by this point in my life. There are a lot of little things I have done to deal with these losses, but those things are shaped by me and my life experiences. I believe that there are things you can do as well, but they will be shaped by you and your life experiences.
If I am repeating things you have already heard, I am sorry. And if I have misread your feelings, I apologize for that.
gentle hugs and wishes for better days