Sad to hear this. How can you earn money? Buy groceries get haircut anything?

As a last resort I think some people try electroshock therapy - have you?

That's a long time to suffer the way you have.

If nothing else truly works then perhaps you can hand it all over to God...have you done that, or some similar spiritual thing?

'Don't struggle - go with the flow.'

I am so sorry that your struggle has been for so long. That is a heavy load to carry. I am not sure if this would work for you, but I had to start doing things even when I didn't feel like doing them. I had to face my fears and depression head on. I found things in each day to focus on that were good. Maybe someone being helpful or nice. Maybe a beautiful sunrise or sunset. When the negative came around, I tried to replace the bad with the good so to speak and focus on the positive I had seen. I had to retrain myself to think on good things. I found things I enjoyed doing and did them whether I felt like it or not. Gradually I found that I could look forward to the good even when situations or circumstances were hard. I also got into a Bible study. I found a new foundation for thinking about myself and my experiences and other people. I learned that God created me, loved me, and He made a way for me. He gave me a purpose. He has been my strength when I am weak. He has changed my thinking when I couldn't break out of the old patterns of thinking. If you have any questions, I would love to talk to you. I pray you find what you need to overcome depression. Hugs!

Sometimes med's aren't the answer.
Sometimes the answer is just a good long talk with a friend or finding a hobby your passionate about, or falling in love all over again.

Find out what you need. Find what sparks that flame within you. We all have one. We just need to find what can ignite it. Trust that you'll find it.

It sounds like you're feeling desperate and alone and hopeless.
I am struck by how many of us feel so lonely in this illness.
For me, there is no simple answer. I have tried just keeping a journal
writing down how bad I feel 0 to 10 daily.
Is there some way to break the cycle? It's been such a long time
for you and the longer it goes on the worse it feels (in my experience).
I will pm you. I feel like I have a lot in my heart to give and would
love to make a new friend,

I've been depressed since the early 90's too. I just do what I can day to day, Are you able to function? Do you have a job? For me I keep going for my husband and son who need me. I hope you can find something to help on to.