I don't know what to do anymore. I feel like more often than not, all I do is upset people. I try to help but it backfires and I make things worse. I know it's impossible, but I just want everyone to be happy. Whenever I try to do something to make people happy, I end up just screwing everything up.


Then there's just my own issues, I took two days off this week to get things done around the house (it's a neglected disaster - the weight of depression doesn't give me any willpower or strength or motivation to do anything but the bare minimum), but nothing has gotten done. My stomach has been upset, I've been having sinus headaches, none of that makes me want to get up and moving either.

I feel like a useless lump. My daughter's getting to the age where I can't do anything right, and all my other relationships seem so one-sided right now - I'm doing all the work. It's tiring to be the only one putting forth any effort. Some I'm just leaving alone for now, others I need so I keep trying. I can't tell you (though you probably know) how often I think about just leaving everything behind for a while and running off somewhere, just get away from my normal pathetic life. But I can't because I have a child to think about, I have a job I need to go to, and I don't have the money to do anything. And I mean ANYTHING.

I'm feeling pretty alone at the moment, so I understand if no one has anything to say to this, I just needed to let it out a little. And since I can't talk to anyone in person, you guys get to read it. :)