Depression Support Group
Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.
I only ever loved one man in my life. I loved him with every ounce of my being. With everything I had. With everything I am. I still do. I always will.
He left me a little more than 3 years ago. I gave him 26 years of my life. Now, I am 59 years old. I know I will never love again. I will never find love again. And Please dont say "yes, you will" or anything like. I know I won't. Sometimes you just know things.
It hurts. It still hurts. It always will. He crapped all over my life and then went his merry way with #4. They are supremely happy and I am totally empty inside. I still cry myself to sleep. I dont go places where I know he will be, which is difficult cause this is a small town.
I don't think it is better to have loved and lost rather than never loving at all. I dont see how that can be true. The pain is even worse than when my mother died. It's almost a physical pain. It comes and goes like the ocean tides, but it's never completely gone. His birthday is this weekend. I will grieve.
He left me a little more than 3 years ago. I gave him 26 years of my life. Now, I am 59 years old. I know I will never love again. I will never find love again. And Please dont say "yes, you will" or anything like. I know I won't. Sometimes you just know things.
It hurts. It still hurts. It always will. He crapped all over my life and then went his merry way with #4. They are supremely happy and I am totally empty inside. I still cry myself to sleep. I dont go places where I know he will be, which is difficult cause this is a small town.
I don't think it is better to have loved and lost rather than never loving at all. I dont see how that can be true. The pain is even worse than when my mother died. It's almost a physical pain. It comes and goes like the ocean tides, but it's never completely gone. His birthday is this weekend. I will grieve.
I think you need to swap to selfish mode right about now.
He has hurt you, not died!
You are hurting for sure and there is no easy fix for that, sorry I cannot say I know how it feels.
From what I read you are the victim in this scenario. I think you need to hold your head up high and go where he might be with impunity. Remember he did wrong not you. Reclaim yourself, he does not define who you were or who your are.
I really hope you can put this guy to rest, not literally as that will not end well for you, but figuratively. Allow yourself to live without him, why not??
All the best.
You are worth more than him and his new wife. Somehow you have to get yourself out of that hole you have dug for yourself. You have to realize that life can be good without him in it. You are stuck in limbo and I hope you are seeing a therapist to help you make the changes necessary to make a new life for yourself.
You really have to start to think about yourself and as trisha says, realise that you can live without him. You deserve a good life.
Will it be easy? No but you deserve better than him. Look at those job applications and go to the next interview that becomes available. This man wasn't a saint. Focus on his faults to allow yourself to get past this. Please do something for yourself to get out of this limbo.