IM sorry but i cant go on like this anymore. I wanted to tahnk everyone for your words of support, but i think i should just get my things in order and plan to go. Ill never get a job becauase they will check out my absensces from my other job, and if i do get one, i will have anxiety and panic attacks again. its been the same for years. maybe its just how it is for me. i dont want this anymore. i am so tired just want to sleep. please take care of yourselves.

Dear Trayanne! I know how you feel! I have a great suggestion for you about Jobs, but I don't think I can post a link on these replies. If you eMail me, I can eMail you back an organization that is focused on people like us who are struggling vocationally. About wanting to move the heck away from people... sometimnes a geographical change IS the answer to your problem. I have done it several times and I find it to be very therapeutic. But that's just me! Hope that you are feeling happy and healthy real soon. I'd like to be your friend to talk to when you need somebody to "be there" for you. Best Wishes, - Mollie.

Thank you for the info. My therapist also talked about that, but at this point i dont think i am going to therapy anymore. Doesnt help and i cant afford it, even though its pretty cheap. I wish i was just gone. im sorry i dont know if i have anything left.

I'm so sorry to hear you're feeling this way! Are you certain you can't get a job? Maybe a change in vocation would be beneficial for a while, something you could put on your resume that would show responsibility and hard work. Don't be afraid to say you had absences from work due to medical issues, that's the honest truth. Did you use meds to control the panic attacks? I found them very useful, but you might have to find the right ones that work for you. I know how it feels to be tired and want to just be done with it all, but you CAN do this and you'll feel stronger and better about yourself when you make it to the other side of this.

You are tired from having to mange so much. Allow yourself to rest and let go for awhile.

I sometimes get to feeling the grass may be greener someplace else also. It just makes me feel good thinking of other places I could be. Sometimes it can help to actually move and sometimes it is better to hang on and work at making life better where we are already at - it just depends. We all need to 'get away' sometimes from the pressures of life and just thinking about someplace else can make us feel better as we cope with were we are at now.

((hugs)) Patricia

im sorry that your interview didn't go well. isolating tho isn't the best thing to do. you have to take deep breaths.

when you say you don't care, that's the depression. it is a hard battle i understand your pain and you are NOT alone.

don't apologize. i hope that you can find some peace trayanne. gentle hugs.