my life is falling apart.the one person who I thought would be there, my girlfriend of 2 years, says she hasn't given up on me that's why she's calling, but she isn't doing anything else. she isn't coming around, we aren't working on us. she said you haven't shown me you've done anything to change,she hasn't been around how would she know?

this one guy who I thought was my friend, is apparently playing me for information, playing both sides of the fence, telling me to show others I changed, to prove everybody wrong. and telling others other things. he told me, that my girlfriend was talking to this other guy all the time. she asked me if I bumped my head thatdenise shows then he shows her a fake screenshot conversation where I said things I never said. he had me so stressed out today at work, pushing me to the breaking point, where I picked up a chef's knife, was staring at it thinking of stabbing myself in the neck. my boss walked by asking what I was doing, I said nothing and put it down. he took me outside and said this too shall pass just remember that. I don't know who's on my side was doing what, I just know I'm depressed.