Depression - Teen Support Group
Teen depression is marked by persistent sadness, discouragement, loss of self-worth, and loss of interest in usual activities. Depression can be a temporary response to many situations and stresses. Teens may be more susceptible to depression due to the normal maturation process, the stress associated with it, and conflicts with parents as they become more independent.
I had a DS a while back and decided I didn't need it anymore. Guess I was wrong.
I feel like everything in my life is falling apart. I have totally screwed myself by joining the military. I thought it would like..fix things? Give me a path for my future? I guess at the time I thought most of my depression and anxiety was based around me not having a way to go to college, but now I can see that it's just there. All the time. I gained weight to join the military. I was underweight from struggling with an eating disorder and I gained weight because I thought they wouldn't let me join. Turns out they aren't as concerned with being underweight so much as overweight. It was great at first. Now it's just...triggering. It makes me want to die to be perfectly honest. I got physically injured at a drill which has put quite the wrench into my plans. I thought I'd be able to handle being yelled at and treated like shit because that's how it is at home, but it actually is just another place that makes me feel like shit.
I'm bad at it. Simple as that. I'm not good at anything in the military except for the first aid things we were taught. And I'm pretty sure that's only because I'm used to stopping my own bleeding.
I lied to get in. I said I've never been depressed or hurt myself or been hospitalized for a suicide attempt, but all of that has happened. I feel trapped. I want out. There's been a bunch of shit going wrong with how my back injury has been handled, and I told them that was why I want out. They don't believe me. My sergeant says it's because I'm weak. I have a "tiny heart". He's right. But how am I supposed to tell him why I want to quit? He doesn't even believe the reason I haven't seen a civilian doctor over my back is because my dad is an asshole (Unmedicated bipolar. Scary to be around. Unpredictable. Totally unhelpful.)
I'm also afraid they'll think I'm lying which is hella illegal. And my parents would find out what a huge disaster I am. After my last bought in the hospital and they're extraordinarily unhelpful reaction, it's best I keep it to myself.
My sergeant wants me to AWOL for three drills and get a general discharge. Problem is, it ruins my chances of getting good jobs, my credit, and my ability to go to college.
I'm scared. I don't know what to do. My lifeline is moving away from me tomorrow for college, and I'm going to be alone. I feel trapped and like there's only one way out, but I don't want to die. Did you know someone almost always kills themselves at BCT? They told us that during my first drill. It would be me. I can't handle it. Can't handle what happens if I don't go either. I'm trapped.
I feel like everything in my life is falling apart. I have totally screwed myself by joining the military. I thought it would like..fix things? Give me a path for my future? I guess at the time I thought most of my depression and anxiety was based around me not having a way to go to college, but now I can see that it's just there. All the time. I gained weight to join the military. I was underweight from struggling with an eating disorder and I gained weight because I thought they wouldn't let me join. Turns out they aren't as concerned with being underweight so much as overweight. It was great at first. Now it's just...triggering. It makes me want to die to be perfectly honest. I got physically injured at a drill which has put quite the wrench into my plans. I thought I'd be able to handle being yelled at and treated like shit because that's how it is at home, but it actually is just another place that makes me feel like shit.
I'm bad at it. Simple as that. I'm not good at anything in the military except for the first aid things we were taught. And I'm pretty sure that's only because I'm used to stopping my own bleeding.
I lied to get in. I said I've never been depressed or hurt myself or been hospitalized for a suicide attempt, but all of that has happened. I feel trapped. I want out. There's been a bunch of shit going wrong with how my back injury has been handled, and I told them that was why I want out. They don't believe me. My sergeant says it's because I'm weak. I have a "tiny heart". He's right. But how am I supposed to tell him why I want to quit? He doesn't even believe the reason I haven't seen a civilian doctor over my back is because my dad is an asshole (Unmedicated bipolar. Scary to be around. Unpredictable. Totally unhelpful.)
I'm also afraid they'll think I'm lying which is hella illegal. And my parents would find out what a huge disaster I am. After my last bought in the hospital and they're extraordinarily unhelpful reaction, it's best I keep it to myself.
My sergeant wants me to AWOL for three drills and get a general discharge. Problem is, it ruins my chances of getting good jobs, my credit, and my ability to go to college.
I'm scared. I don't know what to do. My lifeline is moving away from me tomorrow for college, and I'm going to be alone. I feel trapped and like there's only one way out, but I don't want to die. Did you know someone almost always kills themselves at BCT? They told us that during my first drill. It would be me. I can't handle it. Can't handle what happens if I don't go either. I'm trapped.
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I feel so dirty and used I was drunk and passed out at a party when I came around some guy was on top of me rapeing me he covered my mouth and told me to shut up afterwards he got up and got dressed and said I better not tell anyone I found my friend and reported that I had been raped after having medical checks and them getting DNA I've taken the morning after pill IAM just so depressed and...
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Upon his departure, he remarked, "I am in many people’s pockets; no one will believe you." Have you ever grappled with the silence that follows sexual assault, where the perceived impossibility of being believed necessitates self-censorship?
I think the important thing here is that you got in under the false pretense of being more emotionally stable and healthy than you actually were. There's a reason they try to weed out the people who aren't likely to be strong and stable enough to get through basic training. It sounds like for you, after the childhood you allude to, it's triggering an emotional reaction that is further destabilizing you.
If you want to, you can reply here or message me with a clear step by step account of what's going on and maybe I or someone else can try to guide you towards help. I for one have no military experience and I can't understand what your situation is, beyond the fact that you aren't really well enough to stand up to the tremendous stress of basic training. It would be great if you could make it through because of the sense of accomplishment you'd have, but if it is damaging you and giving rise to suicidal impulses you ought to get out.
I'll message you.