Dementia Support Group

Dementia is the progressive decline in cognitive function due to damage or disease in the brain beyond what might be expected from normal aging. Particularly affected areas may be memory, attention, language and problem solving, although particularly in the later stages of the condition, affected persons may be disoriented in time, place and person (not knowing who they...

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ambling1 09/10/2011

My father-in-law has been acting increasingly bizarre in the last five years. He has become so "off" that people in our little town have called us to report behaviours...he also has been having outbursts of rage at stores/ the pharmacy/ bad enough that they call or tell us about it. He began calling family members and friends (apparently about 4 yrs. ago) and started telling increasingly outrageous lies about me, his ex-wives, his daughter, his ex-girlfriend, and his ex-step-daughters. (i.e. We're stealing his money, or trying to steal his business, or have him committed). We just figured it all out together while he was hospitalized with pneumonia. He can't stay on task (?) with a conversation and just leads off on another topic. He also can't remember to take his heart, bp, diabetes, and cholesterol meds. Yesterday he denied knowing he had a heart condition and claimed his gp doctor wasn't any good and that he didn't have high pb, cholesterol or a heart cond. Then he couldn't remember when he'd last been to the doctor (1 month ago).

I know that is all long, but the addition to this is that he has always been a bit paranoid of the government, and has always been, well...an ass. He's been emotionally cruel and manipulative to his wives, and children and has always (according to ex-wives) been unable to accept responsibility for his actions/words.

So it's a mess and his gp says he passes the mini-mentals, but he still thinks he has dementia maybe some other mental problems. He has an appt. with a neurologist in three weeks...is that the right specialist? Should we get appts. with other specialists, too? (psychiatry)

deleted_user 09/10/2011

A neurologist is the person to see. My husband has passed the Alzheimer's test because he can draw a clock face with 10 past 6 and count backwards from 100 by 7s. He knew the president, VP and Governor. But he didn't know what day or even what year it was, so he has some dementia via the test. Via behavior, I think he has a lot! His personality is totally changed, he no longer wants to do anything but watch old movies on TV--but he has forgotten how to operate the remote or find the movie guide, so I have to do it for him. He also can no longer figure out his cell phone. He used to be a great bridge player, now he can't even arrange his cards, much less keep track of the bidding and play. The neurologist told him to quit drinking, but I see no change after six months of total sobriety, except for an increase anxiety level. Oh, yes, he seem to have depth perception problems and double vision so he can't drive, or shouldn't. He has symptoms of myasthenia, but not the diagnositic antibodies. But, a neurologist can do other "rule-out" tests, so you need to try that. Frankly, I find that I am the one who may need psychotherapy. I hate all those references to "loved ones," because I don't love the man my husband has turned into.

deleted_user 09/10/2011

A neurologist can do some testing but you might also want to get him checked out by a cardiologist. There are heart problems with symptoms that will mimic dementia. There are also heart problems that cause dementia and if they are treated they can slow the progression or additional damage.

Everything you describe is typical of people with dementia. Denial is the biggest problem because it sets up a whole host of problems including refusal to take meds that would help. Talk to the neurologist about using a patch medication which only gets changed every few days. That seems to make things easier since you could go to change it for him.

Arleeda I've found that doctors don't want you to do anything because it makes prescribing easier for them. If you husband enjoys a cocktail or two what's the harm? You could also use it as a reward for him doing other things.

deleted_user 09/11/2011

1. Mostly as said - neurologist and other checks. Even urinary infections can have significant effects on behaviour and dementia.

2. Dementia sometimes creates personality changes which are new to the sufferer. But in other cases, it can actually magnify existing traits turning even good characteristics into bad.

A brain scan can be a big help with diagnosis of dementia because not all those suffering from this disease exhibit a poor memory - though many only test for that.

You need to get as much information about what is going on as possible - then you can make decisions about what happens next. Fore-warned is fore-armed as they say.

jazzkeys 09/26/2011

But, How do you get them to the doctor?

deleted_user 09/26/2011

Jazzkeys that's one of the two hardest things to do. The other is getting them to understand that they have dementia.

Often people won't go to the doctor until something happens that forces them. They fall (common dementia symptom is unsteadyness and falling) and go to the ER. Or they have accidents around the home.

If you have a family doctor that is a good place to start, but any doctor can be helpful. Something to keep in mind is why you want them to go to the doctor. If you see problems but don't know why they are happening you need to check out other possible causes. Heart problems will produce similar symptoms and can often be treated. Many people who have been deprived of oxygen will have short term dementia. Also high or low blood pressure.

If you are pretty certain that the person has dementia but they are past the point of treating and you know they have no other health issues it's a matter of maintenance. In that case a GP who deals with elder patients is the best. They can prescribe anti-psychotic drugs to deal with mood problems.

deleted_user 09/28/2011

I, too, am "working" thru some of my husband's behaviors as in the explosive anger (this has been lessened some with Lexapro) but is still evident. In the past, people would often tell me of "being scared" of his anger. We have seen a neurologist and a psychiatrist; my husband is brilliant and was also able to do all the counting and daily memory tests but he drivers VERY slowly, has memory losses VERY evident to me, is becoming a fanatic for loud, aggressive TV and audio tapes/shows, and is having trouble with technology that he used to be able to manage. These are just the things you mentioned, but they are not normal! I strongly encourage you to get the therapy YOU need; we caregivers need a comfortable place to be affirmed and educated...family and friends do not always make themselves available for this. I also do not "love" the person this man is turning into; I think that is normality, too! And, to jazzkeys, it took a LOT of coercing and threats from me to get him to the above docs; he is now saying he will take no more medication and go to no more doctors. I am now at a stalemate.

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