Dementia Support Group
Dementia is the progressive decline in cognitive function due to damage or disease in the brain beyond what might be expected from normal aging. Particularly affected areas may be memory, attention, language and problem solving, although particularly in the later stages of the condition, affected persons may be disoriented in time, place and person (not knowing who they...
I'm just wondering if anyone has these same thoughts........
is there some symptom that your loved one has that is more difficult than any other of the symptoms for you to deal with? I mean I can deal with the repeating conversations, the weird questions, helping him get dressed and tons of other things but his following me around really drives me crazy. I try and try to over look it but every once in awhile I feel like I just want to strap him to a chair and say, "Could you just sit here for a bit and give me some space!?" I open the bathroom door after I'm done- guess whose there? I turn around in the kitchen and guess whose there? I stop by the bedroom to get something and guess whose there? AAHHHH I guess it could be worse. At least so far I'm not having to deal with the aggression.
is there some symptom that your loved one has that is more difficult than any other of the symptoms for you to deal with? I mean I can deal with the repeating conversations, the weird questions, helping him get dressed and tons of other things but his following me around really drives me crazy. I try and try to over look it but every once in awhile I feel like I just want to strap him to a chair and say, "Could you just sit here for a bit and give me some space!?" I open the bathroom door after I'm done- guess whose there? I turn around in the kitchen and guess whose there? I stop by the bedroom to get something and guess whose there? AAHHHH I guess it could be worse. At least so far I'm not having to deal with the aggression.
Yes, there are a couple of things that bother me more than other. One is when she does not trust me. I know that is the disease but it drives me batty sometimes. The one other thing is that she is totally, 100% dependent on me for every single thing. Her dementia is mild still and the Exelon is working well but she still has episodes. I hear my name called out at least 20-30 times a day. The worst time is when it's after I've said goodnight and gone to bed. If I go out for an hour to get an errand done she calls numerous times to find out when I will be home. When she is at the respite care for 2 days of the month she calls constantly with reasons why I should pick her up. She has friends and activities there but she is mainly only willing to do thing if I am there with her and I would just like a tiny bit of space once in a while. I, like you, can deal with helping with getting dressed, bathing, meals, laundry, handling all finances, etc., etc. I believe most of us suffer from lack of "me" or "down" time to just relax and rejuvenate.
Are we married to the same person? I live with the same thing. I no longer have the luxury of a few minutes to myself. He is with me 24/7 and I mean 24/7. His doctor told me I have to become "selfish" and take time for myself ... how? We own a business that is very time demanding. In December I took over his division and am "trying" to keep my division going. He rides with me to/from work. He sits in front of my desk at work. At home he will sit in the room I am in. If I stay up (hoping he will go to bed), he stays up with me. His attention span is about 6 minutes. If he starts a project it is forgotten in 6 minutes. He then walks off to start something else leaving a mess for me to clean up. If I am in the bathroom; he is outside the door asking if I am in there. I am forever looking for or finding things he has lost. I guess what drives me nuts is forgetting to turn off the water. I have tried everything I can think of to remind him ... so now I have trained myself to listen for water running or check after him when he leaves the kitchen, bathroom, laundry room, etc. I agree with K92607 ... we "suffer" from lack of "me" or down time. I responded to help you but got on my soap box .. sorry. I just want to scream today. Lots of Hugs going your way ..... I truly understand!
We just came from my mom's house. We were there for the weekend and last night when my husband started with his, "where am I sleeping?" ritual, over and over again. She whispered to me, "I don't know how you do it. He's driving me nuts and he's only been here a few hours."
I's good to share with other people isn't it?