I totally and completely failed. I wouldn't advise anyone to do what I did, but it has made my marriage incredibly strong. I made every mistake in the book and gave him every possible out imaginable and he stayed. I owned everything I'd ever done wrong, I promised to never have another secret from him and I committed to loving him above all else. Because of that, he's found he can lean on me, so he has more strength to support me. He trusts me more, so he encourages me to spend more time for myself. We share everything, we respect each others space and needs and no matter what, we always say I love you.

I guess with us is that we have different interest and it kepts us going.
I think having space and being apart is good.
Also having different friends helps us out.

First off, I'm divorced but have reunited with my ex-husband and we're getting remarried. We have 2 young kids together. Our biggest challenge is finding time for just the two of us. Going out to the movies or out to eat is a big problem because currently, our budget won't allow it. We can't afford to eat out and pay a babysitter. Sad but true. When we want to have some intimacy, we have to wait till the kids are in bed and asleep first. By the time they FINALLY fall asleep, my husband is already asleep and I'm ready to go to sleep too.

Hi- My biggest challenge being married is constantly feeling as if I have no identity. My husband overshadows me.

My second problem is that I want to flee. I fantasize of getting out and being alone with no one and no family finally safe.

another challenge and what stokes the fire to want to leave is my husbands desire for any beautiful woman he sees. He does not act on his desire. But I feel like dirt when I think of the younger women. I encouraged my husband to take this new position and move strictly to get away from his VP co-worker. She is out of his life and I did speak to him about not making a new female bestfriend at his new position. So Far he seems to not have taken an interest in nurturing a younger single woman.

I have given up on some fronts. His interest in young women will never go away. His father is the same. Its amazing. It is grotesque. I saw his desire at our niece's 23 birthday party. His interest is sexual. I am married to the man I know when he wants sex. It sickens me that he wants his brothers daughter simply because she is so young and beautiful. I despise his watching young women porn on every instrument in the house. Is anyone elses marriage this way??? I think so. Why do they stay married to us? I should just look away from this and accept him.

I did try to get a divorce. I leased an apartment ( though I am unemployed). It is so weird how you think of death first then divorce. But I actually thought I would divorce him first then I could have privacy to kill myself. More abnormal thinking at work. I am not sure what is wrong with my mind. I do not have a sense of identity. That illness is found under a narcissist. But I am avoidant. anxious. paranoid. who feels undone if I interact with anyone. If I am unknown in a crowd I feel OK. Also, I feel nothing for other strangers. That falls under psychopath. I don't feel like one.

Anyway I want other men too. But I would never act on it either because in the end I would believe they would reject me too.

But He is the only person who actually knows me on the planet. I am writing here because I am alone without female friends ( by choice- I am avoidant after all). It is a relief to have somewhere to go.