Compulsive lying Community Group
For individuals who lie because they cannot reveal their true selves to other people in their lives at the risk of being disliked. Are you a victim of this type of abuse??
I have always told little lies since I can remember,my mom lies my brother lies and it's something I never put much thought into. In 2015 I met the man I should have married and I was and still am so in love with him. I had my first miscarriage in march 2016 it's was beyond deviating. I became depressed started hiding more and more stuff to not have to deal with consequences, emotions and people being upset. It was a easy way for me to hid from the truth and cope with fantasy instead of reality. In June 2016 I moved in with the man I love and it was beyond the happiest day of my life. A few weeks after moving there I got pulled over found out my license had been suspended because of a ticket I had not paid and my car was impounded. Instead of telling the truth I lied and told him I wrecked my car and had to get a new one when the truth was I couldn't afford the fees on my own and didn't want him to be upset with me. From that point on the lies spiraled out of control. I became pregnant again and I really thought this was a blessing a new start and the best thing I could ask for...a few weeks past and I miscarried. Instead of telling him I pretended to still be pregnant in the hopes I would be come pregnant again soon. It's almost like I lost all touch with reality. This wonderful man has still after all of that after lying to him about a baby for 9 months he still stood by me. I got help for my issues and started medicine an treatment...my insurance lasped awhile ago and I have been off meds for almost 3 months. I started lying again about everything and hurt him more to the point I lost him. Even tho it hurts and all I can think is how I don't want to live without him I know I have to push thru and get help to change my life for my kids. I really need help I just honestly don't know where to start.
The first step is realizing you need help. That takes a lot of courage. My wife and I went through a miscarriage this year as well so i can understand the grief you went through, as well as the desire to simply hide from the world and pretend that everything is going well. Not sure if it will be helpful to you, but i have found that the best way to stop lying (or, in reality, to start being more honest) is to start with small truths that could be embarrassing or have painful discussions attached to them (a parking ticket, a missed timing, etc.). From there, it gets easier. The initial steps are really hard as you might psych yourself up into thinking that others will judge you, or that it will cause a huge fight. In reality, people can be a lot more understanding than you would think. You have to give them a chance to be there for you, but more importantly, you have to give yourself a chance. I hope this helps, and good luck.