Coming Out Support Group

This community is dedicated to the challenges that gay men and lesbian women face, both between the partners in a relationship and from other influences (family, society, etc.). Find support and talk to others who may be facing the same challenges, and share your experience.

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Lesbian & Gay
/ Coming Out Support Group

"Questioning"

hauth
hauth
I don't know 100% what I am yet. I'm leaning right now more to being gay than bi. But I'm afraid of labeling myself or making up my mind. I don't feel right coming out as either though I have told some people about me being questioning this for myself. Even may have started a bit of labeling though.
Did you go through this too? How did you figure it out?

I'm not the kind of person that really does much experimenting, I haven't been close to being in a relationship for almost 10 years now.. dealing with some other stuff too.
I was in denial until 5 years ago, my relationship 10 years ago was with the opposite sex. I was never really attracted but we were like friends who happened to sleep together, but I've been more attracted to others than him. Though the thought, at the moment, makes me have more mixed emotions towards not excited.

Maybe I do know but afraid of what will happen IF I fall for someone of the opposite sex hehe
WyndWytch
WyndWytch
Yes I did go through the same thing, however I learned through a good deal of self reflection that it didn't matter. The label is irrelevant and is nothing more than something that is inaccurate. You like who you like and you don't whom you don't and it is okay. The key is being comfortable with it yourself... to quote pirates of the carribbean "It's not just about living forever, Jackie. The trick is living with yourself forever." Its not about being gay or straight, its about you being comfortable with being willing to love who you want to love and who makes you happy.
Razor91
Razor91
I went through the same thing, I had a really hard time accepting it as a teenager, mainly because I was very depressed about life and I thought here's another thing someone can bully me for, the older I got the less I cared. But back then, I would go over and over it almost sorting it out on paper, weighing up how many guys I had fancied and girls too.
I started to endlessly research it, thinking about it now, I seemed kinda bonkers back then lol. I heard something on it though, that if you start to question your sexuality, you're probably not straight to begin with.
seemad
seemad
i have been thru the stage as well. I wonder sometimes how many straight people who know they are straight are questioning. I always questioned myself and didn't have access to any form of knowledge or media during those days.Its a constant struggle growing up. However when u are at the stage where u know that there is something more then just that that's when the answers starts to unfold. It's a personal journey for each one of us and coming out is just as hard. I hope u are true to yourself no matter what happens as unless u are not happy u can't make someone else happy.
lonewolff
lonewolff
The same thing happened to me and it turned out I was just scarred to be gay, if that makes sense. I had this idea in my mind that it was fine, liking a person of the same sex but that I couldn't have a life if it wasn't with a guy. I didn't know I could have a family and be happy without a man. But when I realized that these were just ideas my family/society had put in my head. Than I just started asking myself questions and I realized I just wasn't attracted to men and that is completely fine.

I dont know if this made sense but I hope it helps!