Coming Out Support Group
This community is dedicated to the challenges that gay men and lesbian women face, both between the partners in a relationship and from other influences (family, society, etc.). Find support and talk to others who may be facing the same challenges, and share your experience.
So I have been worrying lately because the future is making me nervous. I am very excited to graduate and go to college in 2 years and it really gives me hope. I want to meet new people, I'm moving back home (currently living in another country) and I can't wait! I am excited to get my majors in biology. The only thing I am scared of is finding or not a partner. I am lesbian and no one knows about it except for one of my friends and he is really supportive. Anyway the thing is I am scared I will either never find someone or that I'll fall in love with someone but I won't be able to share that aspect of my life with my family. My partner will want to meet my parents and I won't be able to do anything about it. My mom "isn't homophobic" but she can't stand the thought of her daughter watching Ellen DeGeneres God help her if her daughter is gay! Also another thing she once said that shocked me and made me very sad is that she was "sorry for homosexuals, it's not their fault; it's a disease". I was so disappointed when she said this. I don't know if any of this made sense and I guess it isn't really a question I just want opinions from an "outsider p.o.v." I guess.
WyndWytch
your mothers stance is little more than that of someone who is horribly undereducated and misinformed. You can fix that. When she says stuff like that, talk about it and put facts to her. As long as she is willing to talk she is willing to learn and with learning comes an ability to grasp concepts which leads to acceptance. She won't be able to get there though unless someone helps her. As far as falling in love, that happens when it happens. Unfortunately it has to take its time to make the right matches. It won't happen right away, but one thing to always remember about life.... Our mental state is a self fulfilling prophecy. So if you are dead set that you will Never find someone, you won't because you will actively though subconsciously make sure you don't. The fact is having someone is not an essential part of every day life. Sure companionship is nice but you can do just fine without it. You have thus far, so my thought stop worrying about it. When someone comes along you will be fine, for now, you don't need it. I lived single for almost 10 years. My way of dealing with that... I got a dog :P worked quite well, she was always there for a cuddle or a pet and I had my companion. I talked with friends as well so between my pet and friends it made it really easy to get enough companionship. So there are ways to get to where you simply don't worry about it and then it can happen in its time without you possibly not seeing it. Hope this is of some help for you. Take care and grats on graduating :D
denise03
You have so much hope and promise about you and sounds like you are headed in the right direction. I hope that your family will see that so long as you are your best self there should be no fear. People are often afraid of the unknown and that is what stalls them from opening to understanding. It would be good to go together to groups where families were first unable to accept but found their way. If they could explain then your family might see hope and understanding.
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