Coming Out Support Group
This community is dedicated to the challenges that gay men and lesbian women face, both between the partners in a relationship and from other influences (family, society, etc.). Find support and talk to others who may be facing the same challenges, and share your experience.
hi folks -
julie cohen (our amazing new advisor) and i are watching this community carefully, because we want to ensure that we are creating a safe, supportive place for individuals who are facing (or have recently faced) the challenge of "coming out" as gay to family and friends. i strongly believe that this is one of our most valuable communities, and i am committed to keeping it a positive and helpful place.
given some of the recent discussions, i want to be clear about a few things:
1) DailyStrength is NOT a religious site, and we do not endorse any particular religion or belief. Rather, we believe in everyone's right to their own beliefs, as long as they don't infringe upon anyone else's rights.
2) Obviously, threats, racism, and any form of individual or group "bashing" is unacceptable. If you have a problem with homosexuality or want to "cure" homosexuals, then you simply don't belong here. I kindly ask that you do NOT join this community if you have any motive besides encouraging and supporting those in need to accomplish whatever it is that they'd like to do. We will remove posts and ban users who violate this policy.
3) In some communities, we need to set special ground rules to ensure that we stay on topic and help those in the greatest need. In this particular case, I want to discourage the religious discussions about the morality of homosexuality, and focus on helping people who are going through this challenging time. Religion is an important part of many people's lives, but we can't have it overtaking the other positive aspects of this community.
4) If you feel like you can't abide by the above ground rules, I ask you to not join this community and/or contact the members of this community. There are plenty of other places on the site where you can more freely discuss your religion.
If anyone has any questions, feel free to contact me.
Thanks for listening.
doug
julie cohen (our amazing new advisor) and i are watching this community carefully, because we want to ensure that we are creating a safe, supportive place for individuals who are facing (or have recently faced) the challenge of "coming out" as gay to family and friends. i strongly believe that this is one of our most valuable communities, and i am committed to keeping it a positive and helpful place.
given some of the recent discussions, i want to be clear about a few things:
1) DailyStrength is NOT a religious site, and we do not endorse any particular religion or belief. Rather, we believe in everyone's right to their own beliefs, as long as they don't infringe upon anyone else's rights.
2) Obviously, threats, racism, and any form of individual or group "bashing" is unacceptable. If you have a problem with homosexuality or want to "cure" homosexuals, then you simply don't belong here. I kindly ask that you do NOT join this community if you have any motive besides encouraging and supporting those in need to accomplish whatever it is that they'd like to do. We will remove posts and ban users who violate this policy.
3) In some communities, we need to set special ground rules to ensure that we stay on topic and help those in the greatest need. In this particular case, I want to discourage the religious discussions about the morality of homosexuality, and focus on helping people who are going through this challenging time. Religion is an important part of many people's lives, but we can't have it overtaking the other positive aspects of this community.
4) If you feel like you can't abide by the above ground rules, I ask you to not join this community and/or contact the members of this community. There are plenty of other places on the site where you can more freely discuss your religion.
If anyone has any questions, feel free to contact me.
Thanks for listening.
doug
Thank you so much for stepping in. It has clarified a couple of points for me, but also, as a newish member, it has bolstered my confidence that joining Daily Strength was a good decision and that it IS a safe environment. Thanks again.
I'm sorry if it sounded like I was 'bashing' anyone with my discussions / participation in Coming Out. That's the last thing I want to do -- bash people.
Forgive me though if it sounded like I had my nose where it shouldn't have been, or overstepping my bounds.
Again, I never meant to disrupt the support found on here.
Thanks for the information on other sites..I didn't know that...
Sincerely,
Les38
Personally, I came to this group, specifically because I am a christian and this process has been very traumatic for me do to the conflicts I face within myself. How can I come here for support if I can't include all aspects of my personal challenge, including the fact that I believe (or at least used to) that the Bible states that homosexuality is wrong.
Personally, I haven't read a single thing on these pages that I find offensive, with the possible exception, I'm afraid, of this post establishing "Ground Rules" that I feel are too limiting.
Nobody said that every member of this community has to read every post that's available. If you don't like what you're reading, then stop reading it.
Michelle
Since the age of 13, I have been a huge fan of Joni Mitchell. Huge! I have had every one of her recordings and believe that she is THE BEST songwriter/musician who has appeared in my lifetime. Bar none. I listen to and read every word she has written, and hear the depth and perceptiveness in every lyric. To me, there is no musician or songwriter that even comes close to her. Just get me started and I could go on and on. But I don't, because I know that not everyone feels the way I do. Or maybe they also think she's great, and recognize her talent, but don't share my level of idolatry. Imagine if I were to begin every personal exchange with something like "Well, Joni wrote about that in Shades of Scarlet Conquering, verse two, line three...". No matter how FANTASTIC someone might think Joni Mitchell is, at some point they're going to tell me to shut the hell up about Joni! Not everything is about Joni Mitchell! We know.. YOU LOVE JONI! Point taken! But there's other music out there and we'd like to listen to it without always having you say that Joni would have done it better. Shut. Up.
Now, maybe this analogy feels insulting to someone who has strong religious convictions. How do I DARE compare my adoration of the songs of some Woodstock-era songstress to the convictions that a devoted Christian has for the Bible?
I'm only pointing out that trying to convince people who are in the GENERAL POPULATION that I need them to try... just TRY... to see things the way I see them, and then talk to me from that point of view is not only a waste of time, it annoys the crap out of them! Nobody is telling me not to listen to Joni or to not get misty when I hear Amelia, but they ARE asking me to not expect THEM to listen and cry with me. My devotion is not THEIR devotion, and it's unrealistic of me to expect them to GET IT. There are Joni Mitchell fan clubs and websites and concerts and CDs, and if I need to be SURROUNDED by Joni-love, I'll go there. That's just the way of the world.
I don't think the point could have been made any better. Thank you for sharing your perspective.
I'll freely admit to be an egomaniac, but to be honest I have felt like I instigated all this with my "I don't want to be gay" post of way back when (late November early December.) Maybe that's not true (I hope it's not) but that's how I feel. Therefore, I'll also freely admit that when I read Doug's post, I felt like it was a personal affront. After all, I came to this community as a confused, Christian male. My response today came from that perspective.
I want everyone to know, that Doug contacted me personally and explained the circumstances behind his post. Also, after I made my reply, I read his post again, and realized his intentions were more toward those who come here to "preach" or "convert" us more so than to those of us who are religious and also gay.
My faith in this site has been restored and I understand that, in discussing my personal conflict, no one is going to fault me for including my religious perspective, as long as I'm talking about me, and about my own conflicts, and not preaching at or insulting anyone else.
I'd also like to say that, holdon1954, you're last reply to my original "I don't want to be gay" post was quite helpful to me personally, I even posted a lengthy response.
I am very glad I found this website, and even though I know I have a long way to go, I feel that I've made considerable progress, because of my involvement with this community.
Thanks to all.
Thank you :)