Codependency Support Group
Codependency is defined as someone who exhibits too much, and often inappropriate, caring for another person's struggles. A codependent person may try to change, or feel shame about their most private thoughts and feelings if they conflict with the other person's struggles. If you are on a journey towards self-love, this support group is for you. Join us and find others...
I never thought I'd be on this side of addiction, and maybe I'm saying this prematurely, but I'm worried.
I'm in my first year of recovery from an addiction to cocaine, mainly crack. I'm nearing my one year anniversary, and I'm pretty solid in my recovery. I have a great support network, loving parents and family, a great therapist, several support groups, and many helpful friends.
My brother and mom came to visit me last night and I'm worried about him. He's 16 and he's been drinking and smoking pot for a while now. But this summer it's gotten really out of control, I think. He's getting high every night and he's thinking about moving out of my parents house to go live with some friends. He hates my parents, which I understand. I've been there.
I'm worried if he moves out, it will be a clear path to addiction. The town where he is living is infamous for pot, and the pot community is just a step away from the meth, crack, and heroin scene.
I'm not trying to sound cocky, but I think I'm a really good listener, and I'm generally good at helping people sort through situations and emotions. But I feel completely helpless in this situation. I care about him so much, I just want to protect him and take care of him. I'm trying SO HARD not to tell him what to do or to give him advice, because I know I would have hated that when I was 16. I don't want to lose my connection with him. He talks to me really openly because he knows I've been through a lot. But I don't want to just passively watch him go down that path.
So far, I've just been trying to listen and trying to point out that things with parents do get better. He only has 2 years left at home.
Any advice? I think I just need to vent to others about my worries and try and be a good friend and sibling to him, staying away from the parent role.
I'm in my first year of recovery from an addiction to cocaine, mainly crack. I'm nearing my one year anniversary, and I'm pretty solid in my recovery. I have a great support network, loving parents and family, a great therapist, several support groups, and many helpful friends.
My brother and mom came to visit me last night and I'm worried about him. He's 16 and he's been drinking and smoking pot for a while now. But this summer it's gotten really out of control, I think. He's getting high every night and he's thinking about moving out of my parents house to go live with some friends. He hates my parents, which I understand. I've been there.
I'm worried if he moves out, it will be a clear path to addiction. The town where he is living is infamous for pot, and the pot community is just a step away from the meth, crack, and heroin scene.
I'm not trying to sound cocky, but I think I'm a really good listener, and I'm generally good at helping people sort through situations and emotions. But I feel completely helpless in this situation. I care about him so much, I just want to protect him and take care of him. I'm trying SO HARD not to tell him what to do or to give him advice, because I know I would have hated that when I was 16. I don't want to lose my connection with him. He talks to me really openly because he knows I've been through a lot. But I don't want to just passively watch him go down that path.
So far, I've just been trying to listen and trying to point out that things with parents do get better. He only has 2 years left at home.
Any advice? I think I just need to vent to others about my worries and try and be a good friend and sibling to him, staying away from the parent role.
is there any way you could spend more time with him doing things you both enjoy, having someone to talk and have fun with can make all the difference.
I have grown adult siblings (50+ -) and they still fight and compete as if we were 10 years old.
You simply can not save your brother. And your parents will undermine any thing that you try to do for him.
Your parents might be wonderful and loving but the situation is out of control and the best help you can give to your brother is simply to save your self and wait for better days after you both have grown up and independent.
The first year in recovery is a great start and God bless for it - but it is far from over.
We can not save other people and that is a sad fact, but if you keep on saving your self and that will be the best help you can ever give to your brother and he will see it.
People do not go by the things we say - they watch and see what we do.