Codependency Support Group

Codependency is defined as someone who exhibits too much, and often inappropriate, caring for another person's struggles. A codependent person may try to change, or feel shame about their most private thoughts and feelings if they conflict with the other person's struggles. If you are on a journey towards self-love, this support group is for you. Join us and find others...

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/ Codependency Support Group

Has a Hold on Me Today....

RockNMetalChic
RockNMetalChic
My codependency really has a hold on me today- i went to bed around 12 midnight and woke back up at 3 am and have been up ever since- crying- i lay there and i look around and its dark and i'm lonely and all alone with nothing but my pillow to clutch and tell myself i'm ok as i rock back and forth .... i am so lonely and alone and i know i will always be this way..... since i was little i dreamed of getting married and i used to sit on my moms lap and tell her all my plans and i'd ask- u will be there right? well mom would reply of course i'll be there ! but mom is dead now and so is the man i was truly in love with- God took them both from me in the same year and now i have to live with knowing i'm in this black hole of hopelessness and have nothing to look forward to- no love- no life with someone else to share it with.... i just feel this codependent feeling of never being able to make it alone is really eating away at me and i'll never overcome this- and its a sad place to be - and a pathetice life i lead...................... :(
deleted_user
deleted_user
Well, that's a couple of very tough blows together RockN. Even someone without codependency would be laid out by that. Death is the hardest thing there is, and you have had two of them.

Feel your feelings, be good to yourself, read some recovery books and come here. I lost my sister when she was still young; she was like a mother to me. It is hard. But your mother's love for you will stay with you and fortify you always.
deleted_user
deleted_user
I am so glad you are here, with us, in DailyStrength. It's wonderful that you found this board and you can share your story with us, and your feelings. Hugs! Thank you for being so open and vulnerable. We are here.. and the stories of others are available 24/7 on this board. You are a wonderful person and I'm glad you are here with us.
deleted_user
deleted_user
I was just thinking, reading anything about taking care of your inner child would be good for this. I really like John Bradshaw. This stuff can really work.
RockNMetalChic
RockNMetalChic
thank u for all the support- i love this board and the people of dailystrength - i've met lots of great people here- including 2 women who have become like sisters to me- and we are planning on hanging out together sometime in the future- i can't wait- they love me and my extended ds family and friends love me- but my real family and local friends are just not supportive so i don't feel comfortable going out to local support groups....so this is my support.... i will take the advice and look up some books to read... much luv xxxxx!
deleted_user
deleted_user
Sounds tough. I don't think this is co-dependency. I think you are depressed and going through the grieving process and not handling it very well. you are only 24 yours old.. so your thoughts are a bit faulty. You have al ong time to find someone to love and you will.
Please see a counselor.
All good blessings.
RockNMetalChic
RockNMetalChic
if i had the money i would see a counselor or therapist- believe me- and age has nothing to do with it- its the events- my life is misery...
deleted_user
deleted_user
I can see what you are saying. I've been there and not a good place. Identification is a great first step.
RockNMetalChic
RockNMetalChic
i'm just giving up on being happy.......... its not for me .......
deleted_user
deleted_user
Rock.: A solution is to give up. Another solution is to do work to feel better.
deleted_user
deleted_user
Hi RockN. It sounds more like you are still grieving hon, and there's nothing unhealthy about that. It takes as long as you need. Don't be so hard on yourself, you have been through way too much to turn it inward. You're fragile, that is not weakness. You did a great and very strong thing just by reaching out to the group! Best wishes always.
TLeigh