My husband suffered a stroke on October 25th. By November 1st, I had him at home because he was unwilling to stay in rehab. He wanted to be home and I knew that he'd get obstinate if forced to stay where he didn't want to be. I took him home.

I have a bad back (degenerative disks) and it's been both physically and emotionally challenging taking care of him and seeing to all the household chores as well as cleaning up the messes he made while doing some remodeling (before the stroke) He's kinda messy to say the least. All an extra burden on me.

I've gotten to a point where the house is mostly in order and it is safe for him. I've established certain ground rules and told him that I would not be jumping every time the dogs barked to go in or out. I wouldn't stop everything I was doing to get him something to drink. I will be taking time to do the things that I need to do while he does his exercises because most of them he can do by himself. While his NEEDS are very important, my needs come before his WANTS.

I feel good about what I've said, but it still feels so very awkward saying it...I almost felt mean! I wasn't angry when I said it, just firm. I'm exhausted and need to take care of myself and I hate asking people to help me although many are willing. My family and our friends have done so much for us.