Codependency Support Group
Codependency is defined as someone who exhibits too much, and often inappropriate, caring for another person's struggles. A codependent person may try to change, or feel shame about their most private thoughts and feelings if they conflict with the other person's struggles. If you are on a journey towards self-love, this support group is for you. Join us and find others...
Recently, I have been contemplating about turning my emotions off for awhile. For the time being, I would like to pretend I am like that imaginary figure "Mr. Spock" from the Star Trek, and act like I don't own any emotions. My therapists never held much of this idea, saying it is repressive, potentially dangerous; a volatile source to sink deeper in non-productive negative emotions. But the reason I want to do it, is because I want a break, so that the negative emotions don't dictate my life. Is it really so bad to treat everyone in your world as if you were the Avon Lady and everyone else is just your customer? Just long enough so you can get a grip on yourself? Isn't that what Prozac and all of those other happy pills do for you anyway? I don't get to take happy pills, because the professional treatment community has a strict control about how much potentially addictive medications they are allowed to subscribe for what sorts of diagnosed cases in the country, laid down by the Germany Ministry of Health and the Public Social Health Insurance Companies. They used to have too many people who were addicted by prescription.
The emotions are not going to go away even if you do turn the switch off, and it can not hurt to test it out for a while.
I have a colleague at work who is a dysfunctional narcissist. When she has a conflict at work, then she spreads the conflict, until a number of people are involved.
My major problem is that she comes barging into my office and bullys me in a loud voice, which intimidates me. I speak softly, and loud voices scare me. Rationally I know what's going on, but emotionally my heart is pounding.
Everything that she says sounds like an accusation, and she wants to control everything I do, although she isn't my boss.
I have tried to talk to her, and found the only method that works is yelling at her, and bullying her back. But I am the strange kind of co-dependent personality.
I hate bullying. I detest manipulation. It makes me sick to my stomach, when she feels intimidated because I feel forced to yell at her. I feel the opposite of elation when I almost make her cry.
Unfortunately, it is the only thing which seems to work, because everytime I try to speak to her rationally about the volume of her voice, she snaps it up as an accusation, and not a plea.
After I while, I felt the urge to physically assault her, which would ultimately cost me my job, and solve nothing. I was getting chest pain, and my blood pressure would rise in the morning, when I know I have to deal with her the entire day.
This person is not an evil person. She is very competent, and mostly helpful, but I cannot make it clear to her that the manner in which she speaks to me - well it is like hitting me in the stomach over and over again.
And that's why I decided to turn off the emotions for a day or two, so that they would not swing so high that I would assault a colleague because her voice was too loud.
Bach's all natural Rescue Remedy...honestly you will be amazed at how great it works.
Also, the next time she walks into your office,
Stand up and walk out... she'll follow you yelling and hollaring but will
be taken off track when she realizes she isn't in the safety of your office.
It really works. Pretty soon she'll stop coming in.