While on the subject of boundaries, many people like
the two books by dr henry cloud Boundaries and safe
people they both helped them Learn. I have not read
Either one myself.

Boundaries are hard and it takes awhile to stop being
A doormat. It took me two years in alanon and therapy
To get myself built up enough to enforse them with bad
guys, Bullies and abusers.

Normal people won't usually push your boundaries unless
they are dysfunctional. HUGS

Thanks I think I need to try them books Today has been a bad. Day for me I struggle with healthy boundaries , at work with avoidant people who just throw a few crumbs and i end up giving people benefit of doubt and let my guard loose and feel like a victim again and resentful like a child . I Hate this cycle :( I know what they are but getting in touch with my feelings and staying conscious and implementing them is the hard part .

salina you are doing great, so much in recovery is Just
being in touch with yourself and your uncomfortable
feelings And Emotions, it takes time so be patient. There
is a lot of grief and anger to move thru, to face, Process
and hopefully let it all go.

I do think if you went to Coda/alanon it would help
You. Its slow going which is good on many levels you
Don't even need to speak just listen to shares and get
some readers. Many times you hear what you needed
To hear from someone elses share.

Both books are suppose to be good but who knows
If they will actually help you change. Much of it needs
To come from the inside out.

Lately i have been on shaky ground working on abuse
And betrayal and it makes me feel weak and sad. I can
feel the Codie inside and she is not liking any of it. I need
to Face my reality as hard and as painful as it is. HUGS

Thank you I think that's the stage I am at , learning to sit in the feelings I find it difficult to stay centred around my feelings and act in my best interest . I think it comes down to taking responsibility for other people's feelings .over my own !! There is a lot of inner child work to do ... I guess it's not just supposed to be a smooth process for us there's going to be ups and downs.

It's amazing to me that this information might seem like common sense to the larger part of society, but to me, it's like fresh news. Appreciate the video.