Codependency Support Group
Codependency is defined as someone who exhibits too much, and often inappropriate, caring for another person's struggles. A codependent person may try to change, or feel shame about their most private thoughts and feelings if they conflict with the other person's struggles. If you are on a journey towards self-love, this support group is for you. Join us and find others...
Hey guys
I'm one of those who reads and reads and reads about a problem before I take any action.
My problem right now is that I can't stand my family. They are all very codependent, but what hurts me is not how codependent they are but my thoughts "I can't believe they're doing this to me". I just recently realized I think like this, it's been so ingrained in me for such a long time, so just "challenging negative thoughts" doesn't help. I need to read and understand and change.
In The Language of Letting Go, Melody Beattie writes:
"We can own our power, wherever we are, wherever we go, whoever we are with. We do not have to stand there with our hands tied, groveling helplessly, submitting to whatever comes along. There are things we can do. We can speak up. Solve the problem. Use the problem to motivate ourselves to do something good for ourselves."
Does anyone know of a book that goes deeper into this subject?
I'm one of those who reads and reads and reads about a problem before I take any action.
My problem right now is that I can't stand my family. They are all very codependent, but what hurts me is not how codependent they are but my thoughts "I can't believe they're doing this to me". I just recently realized I think like this, it's been so ingrained in me for such a long time, so just "challenging negative thoughts" doesn't help. I need to read and understand and change.
In The Language of Letting Go, Melody Beattie writes:
"We can own our power, wherever we are, wherever we go, whoever we are with. We do not have to stand there with our hands tied, groveling helplessly, submitting to whatever comes along. There are things we can do. We can speak up. Solve the problem. Use the problem to motivate ourselves to do something good for ourselves."
Does anyone know of a book that goes deeper into this subject?
You sound to me that you are going the right way.
I have a big dysfunctional family myself and I found that I have all the power within myself so they all can remain dysfunctional while I try to lead (push or pull) them out of their misery.
A cool link that I like is this:
https://independentfew.wordpress.com/2014/10/13/codependency-definition/
And this one too:
http://www.nononsenseselfdefense.com/personalshared.html
Keep it up as you are going.
Some others that are good:
Women Who Love Too Much by Robin Norwood
Love Must Be Tough by Dr. James Dobson