This is the 5th day that I am up at 4:00 am. I have 36 days clean and I just feel like my head is about to explode. My brother is mentally retarded with a mentality of a third grader. He is currently in what we call "the phase". He stays up til midnite, writes on every piece of paper he can get his hands on. Pulls out all my magazines and goes thru them over and over. Rips the newspaper apart. Talks at the top of his lungs constantly repeating himself over and over. Has every light in the house on. Trys to wake up the kids. I even gave him a sleeping pill last nite. He slept for four hours. I know he is exhausted because I sure am. If I tell him to sit down he gets nasty. Every so often he will actually fall asleep in the chair. The slightest noise brings him to full attention. If I suggest going up to bed he starts screaming at me that hes watching the tv or he will say after this movie. I went to two meetings yesterday and they were a great help. God is great. I have been praying with my brother and he often walks around saying I love you God. Please pray for him that this phase will end. His name is Bernie. I have been trying to be loving and caring. Writing in my journal does help and so does reading but it is really hard to comprehend things when he is constantly talking. I have a doctors appointment for him on Monday and I guess just knowing the week end is here and he will be home all day has me really stressing just thinking about it. He goes to school Mon - Fri. He just came in with his coat and hat on and it is only 5:30. His bus doesn't come for another hour and a half. Please pray for me too. My name is Tina.
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