Chronic Pain Support Group
Physicians and professionalsdefine pain as chronic if it lasts longer than three to six months and is persistent. It's distinct from acute pain that is a direct result of injury or trauma. This support group is dedicated to those suffering from chronic pain. Discuss treatments that have worked for you, find advice for your specific experience, and find support. You're not...
I feel so guilty. I know this subject comes up from time to time, I guess I just need to vent. I'm just really feeling down. I'm layed up in bed ....yet again....while my husband is fixing supper. What makes it so bad is that he is rarely home and when he is he winds up taking care of me. I just really feel bad, even though he tells me he enjoys cooking and taking care of me. I guess I'm also just really mad that this pain keeps me from doing the things that I use to love doing and that is cooking for my family for one. I feel like a terrible mom too. I know my kids worry about me at times and I hate knowing that they r worried about me!
I'm just whining and complaint. Sorry.
Anyway, I try to make it up to them when I am feeling better. For my husband I stay on the phone a lot! Keeping him entertained or awake while he is on the road.
For my kids I find myself over doing it....giving in too much :)
What or how do you make it up to your family? What do you do to let them know how much you appreciate their love, care and sacrifices?
I'm just whining and complaint. Sorry.
Anyway, I try to make it up to them when I am feeling better. For my husband I stay on the phone a lot! Keeping him entertained or awake while he is on the road.
For my kids I find myself over doing it....giving in too much :)
What or how do you make it up to your family? What do you do to let them know how much you appreciate their love, care and sacrifices?
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Sorry for your pain and we all understand.
How I try and balance life is very difficult at times because my husband runs a pain management clinic for deployed soldiers and civilians. The last thing I want to do is burn him out.
We have been married for 45 years and my medical history is rather complicated which lead us to fill our hearts and home with adopting special needs children with complicated medical histories themselves. It has been a very interesting life.
At times I could not move my legs up and down nor my upper arms. I have a brain tumor and a couple of other things that make my pain feel like glass exiting my body from the neck down. Good days and then not.....My legs and arms now work with medication. We have a son in a wheelchair, too. There are really good days when I do nothing but clean and rearrange the house, cook and bake. Then there are days like this last week. My brain tumor is really giving me trouble this week and my husband has done nothing but take care of me and that makes me happy. Not guilty. He tells me guilt does not serve a purpose and it robs the person helping of the care taking they really want to furnish.
So, I guess, do what you can, let your husband know how much you appreciate and love him and let the kids know there are good days and bad days in everyone's life.
Peace and Hugs,
Joanne
I am also sorry you are hurting so badly and I totally understand. My husband understands why I am not able to do the things I used to do. It was very hard the first time he had to wash my hair or push my wheelchair but he did it without complaint because he loves me. My disabilities have become the norm and my kids and hubby work around it..it is the new accepted normal. When you love someone you don't do things for them bc you expect a thank you...you do it out of love. I make sure to thank my husband or allow him alone time to recup when he needs it. He knows I appreciate him bc I cry sometimes when he does something as simple as bring me a cup of coffee. We met when I was 14 and he was 15. I am 35 now and we were highschool sweethearts and first loves. I wouldn't trade our memories for anything in the world. Now I color with my daughter or let her read me stories for hours and watch movies or read devotionals with my son...things I had little time for when I worked full time before I got sick. It's a new way of life and I am spending more time w my family. Hang in there sweetheart! We know the language you speak and it can be very challenging at times but we will all have to hold each other up on this difficult path.
Allow your dear hubby the joy of giving. Just let him know how much you love him for helping you. DON'T APOLOGIZE. That only takes away from him the gift of being able to give you the help that he TRULY WANTS to give.
I know it's hard to change your perspective, but this time it really is necessary.
Gentle hugs dear.
I really do have a wonderful family:)
Walkingb it breaks my heart that you don't have the same kind of support:( glad you have found DS to get encouragement and support. Hugs
He got down in front of my chair, took my face in his hands and said "I don't care about that other stuff. I love you. I just want you to be happy". When I'm feeling insecure and yes, sorry for my lot in life, I need reassurance from time to time.
He always tells me that I'm the sanest person he knows and I'm what keeps him sane. I listen while he vents. Sometimes I even rub his feet. We have value to these loved ones of ours. I thought you already told us how you make it up to your family rather nicely? Staying on the phone with your husband probably means more to him than you could know. Something tells me you do more than you think to make "it" up to your family.
Thank you Dixie for making me feel normal. I'm not the only person who feels this way. What a relief. Hugs, Dianna
BTW, are you a nurse?