Welcome.
Prayers!

Thank you, need and love prayers.

Welcome!

Having your health go bad, is one of the biggest changes we face as we grow older, especially if we are not that old!

Like you, I got very sick in my 40's. I came down with severe Rheumatoid Arthritis, which wasn't properly diagnosed or treated in the first 7 years.

I was in constant and disabling pain. Like you, I became extremely depressed. I had to go on disability, and I was bed ridden a lot of the time. I couldn't do anything, including dress or feed myself.

So I spent two years completely pulled away from God. I stopped going to church and reading the Bible and praying. So you are way ahead of where I was at!

Then God spoke to me, and told me to read the Psalms. Here is one verse that really helped me understand that God knew what was happening, and he was there, in spite of it.

"Why am I so depressed?
Why this turmoil within me?
Put your hope in God, for I will still praise Him,
my Savior and my God" Psalm 42:5 HCSB

That really turned the corner for me. Next, I did finally get on better medications, and I found a good church, some supportive friends, and started Seminary. It was a time of great spiritual growth.

God really does work things together for good.

"And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good,[a] for those who are called according to his purpose." Romans 8:28

A few years into this whole new walk with God, I decided to have one foot reconstructed. It was a terrible deformed mess, but the surgery went wrong, and I have had more pain since the surgery, than before.

First, God told me to read Job. That man was my best friend! Then he gave me the following verse, which I memorized and I cling to it a lot.

"Not only that, but we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, 4 and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, 5 and hope does not put us to shame, because God's love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us." Romans 5:3-5

So last year my meds failed in January, and I have been unable to find a drug that works. I have been getting more and more deformities, and most days the pain gets unbearable, especially at night. But I have not gotten depressed. Ok, well, much! Nothing like back when I first got sick.

So at the risk of being pedantic, I want to urge you to keep doing what you are doing. Keep reading the Bible, praying and going to church. And God is going to use this whole terrible health issue to make you more like Jesus. Because this life is not about finding happiness and paying lip service to God.

Instead, it is about being truly changed in our hearts by the Holy Spirit. Our society doesn't see much value in that, and so facing it is a really hard thing to do.

God wants us to have joy in him, regardless of our circumstances. And one day, we WILL be like him, because we shall see him as he is.

"Beloved, we are God's children now, and what we will be has not yet appeared; but we know that when he appears we shall be like him, because we shall see him as he is." 1 John 3:2

We are all waiting for Jesus to appear to be glorified. In the meanwhile, we do have to learn to depend upon Him, in spite of the pain and suffering.

This is a good forum for you to be in, because the main groups are all health related. Pretty much everyone is learning to cope with something, or they have learned, and can help.

I will be praying for you. Please feel free to add to this post, ask questions, or pm me.

"What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us?" Romans 8:31

Thank you Marlene, it's all so scary and overwhelming. I really appreciate you reaching out to me. I was so youthful and hopeful before all this. I'm praying that God heal me completely. I want so much to live a long fruitful life.

I will pray that God will heal you too! Is the risk high, now that your surgery is over?

The real challenge is to find hope, when there seems to be nothing in the physical. But our hope is in God. And that means finding a place of acceptance, no matter what happens.

I just want to make sure you do follow your doctor's orders about your health. I had a close friend, and she got breast cancer. She was an ordained Word Faith minister, and declared that she was healed. She died 10 months later when the cancer metastasized. God can heal, but he also uses doctors.

When you think about it, we are so much better off than people were in Biblical days, to say nothing of even 100 years ago. I would not be alive without modern medicine. I had pneumonia as a baby, and then many times especially in my early 40's. So I try to be grateful for every day. Some days, I fail, but other days I just keep praying and trusting God, in spite of my disabilities and the pain.

Praying for you, and glad you found us.

Thank you very much for your prayers. The hematologist needs to draw blood in March to test for a clotting disorder (a particularly bad one). I have been praying so hard that it will be negative. I won't know until a few weeks or so after March 3. It's been terrifying me to no end. I've been asking everyone to pray for a negative test.

I hope you feel better also, and that is tragic to hear about your friend. I too believe that God puts people and things in your life to help, including doctors, medication, etc.

Hi ce! Welcome! I have been through some really scary illness these last 5 years, but coming out the other side has been amazing! I have found that my faith has grown tremendously and my courage has been increased TONS! I believe the courage from God is where the peace comes from. He takes us through the valleys so we can get to the peaks! I have found for myself that he will lead you to the people that can help you!

I have told this story on this site before but it may help you so here goes! I finished hep-c treatments in 2013. It was the worst time in my life as the TX was TERRIBLE! It was a 48 week walk through HELL! Cleared the virus and moved on. Took a good bit of time to get it together afterwards but felt better than I had in 30 years! During that time I developed a Love for God and bicycles(in that order). In 2014 I broke my back on my mountain bike and was down hard for a while. Got closer to God during that period. Slowly got back to riding 100-400 miles a week and God was there with me.

In2015 I was diagnosed with Melanoma and they were afraid it had moved to being Lymphoma. I was really MAD! I felt like God was hanging me out to dry! Went through the day just angry. took the next day and went on my mountain bike in the woods. Was still real MAD! I must have fallen 10 times when I lost it. Picked up my $3200 bike and threw it down the ravine.(it was a WHAT WERE YOU THINKING moment) Tears running down my face I went to check the damage. None to be found. Rode to my spot. A place on top of the hill where I talk to my Savior. I screamed at him to tell me why. Then I hit my knees and ask him. I said why me God? He immediately said "Why not you? Are you special?" I said but I don't understand why you would take me through all the stuff I have been through to end me here. He said "you have been praying for a stronger faith. What are you going to do here with this?" At that moment I totally got it! I felt it go away.

I rode for 3 more hours and had one of the best rides I have ever had. I came out of the woods and was at total peace with it all. Loaded the bike up and was getting in the truck when I got a call from the Johns Hopkins cancer center saying my doc had talked to the director and she was calling to have me come in and be seen and fixed! He does not fail us! Praise God!

When they did surgery the found that the cancer was nowhere near what they thought it was going to be and the Lymph nodes were clear! This was when I told her that God was not done taking it out yet! She laughed at me but she got it.

I guess what I am saying is DON'T Give up on him because he won't give up on you. Even when I was fusing and cussin with him he was patiently waiting for me to stop and listen for him. he was there in the woods with me, imagine that. He was loving me even when I was hatin on him! I have a picture in my mind from that day in the woods of me riding my bike with him on the back feet out and saying WEEE! Chokes me up every time! He is always there with me!

Hang in there baby! We will all be praying for you!
Prayers
Bill

My favorite: DEU 31:6 Be strong and courageous; don't be terrified or afraid of them. For it is the LORD your God who goes with you; He will not leave you or forsake you."

Thanks Bill, really appreciate that you shared that, and yeah- really need the prayer. I felt like God forgot about me too. I'm so sad and scared.

Bill, thanks for putting your testimony a bit more in order, and adding the part about the melanoma. I must have missed that. And awesome the way God dealt with you, and also that you did not have the more advanced stage of cancer.

As for you ce1502, I am going to keep praying for you. Till the middle of March, when you find out what you need to know. I will pray you do not have the clotting disorder, but no matter what happens, God will minister to you.