Sadmom, I relate. I keep thinking my son will divorce the Wicked DIL, and he did come close. Last January he filed, but then he took her back (after borrowing money from us)....but that is another story entirely. And like you, I always wanted a daughter in law. I have an older son who is married and I absolutely ADORE his wife....actually in some ways she is kinder to me than my own daughter. My own daughter is sometimes a little "too blunt and honest" and can sometimes hurt my feelings, even though she and I have a good relationship. But my daughter in law is just the sweetest ever. And so, I just knew son #2 would have the same type wife. I welcomed it. But what I got was an evil, manipulating, lying she-devil that I never in my wildest dreams knew could even exist. So I have not heard a word from him because he is too big of a coward to phone his mother to say Happy Mothers Day, because it would upset the witch.

sadmom & poodlegirl, part of the reason it hurts so much is because I have always been a supportive, generous, nice mom. My son, who never calls unless he needs something, sent me TEXT today wishing me a Happy Mother's Day. He couldn't even pick up the damn phone? (sorry for the language) He SURE manages to call when he needs something. I told my husband today "NO MORE free car repair for him". He has always gotten away with treating me like this & still gets his car fixed. Those days are over.
My husband keeps telling me that it is just this generation of 18-30 year olds, who think they can treat people any way they want & it's ok. I am also wonder what my ES in thinking today, if he even gave me single thought. Probably not.
My MIL has never really liked me, but I never gave her reason to the way your DIL's have. I was always like a doormat, I just laid there & took her abuse. I hate confrontation & arguing. The older I get, the more I don't mind sticking up for myself. I wish I had taken that stance a long time ago, maybe I could've saved myself some grief. I just cant wait for this day to be over.
I haven't seen my own mother since I was 8, & would give anything to be able to talk to her now. LOL, Im 48 & still want my mother. Even with the way she treated me, I would NEVER have spoken to her disrespectfully. My dad was a mean alcoholic & I still took care of him the last 6 years of his life, never once treated him badly. I taught my sons better than how their acting. They know they should respect me, I've earned at least that much. My youngest did call, but he hasn't gotten any better, & still has no job. It just depresses me to talk to him. I wish my sons would get their "stuff" together.

It is a hard day. I miss my es and I miss my mother.

Saying a prayer Sovery.

my son too is walking in darkness......he does not realize it though......he cannot see his own sins.....He just earned his 2nd college degree MASTERS and thinks he is better than others .....it breaks my heart...he was not raised this way....I tried so hard to teach him empathy and kindness.....I hate to think how he is going to act once he has the PhD.....ughghgh

soverysad...my mom died last year and I miss her so much too....I know how you are feeling

sadmom, that's too bad he has that attitude. I would like for my sons to finish college, but don't see that happening anytime soon. But I wouldn't want them to think they are better than others. You should be proud though, that your son wanted a good education & got it done. That means you did a lot right.