CHRISTIAN PARENTS of ESTRANGED ADULT CHILDREN Community Group
Estrangement makes it difficult to talk about with family, friends, neighbors and church members. Christians are NOT immune to broken families. Talk about your experiences with those who know how you feel and get positive support through your Christian faith...."In these last days difficult times will come, for men will be lovers of self...disobedient to parents,...
Many many years ago, a group of parents were meeting to
organize a support team for parents with troubled teens.
It was called P.I.N, Parents in Need. The philosophy the group
used was 'Tough Love' I remember sitting there listening to the
heartbreaking stories of the hurts the parents had endured while
trying to raise their children to be Godly, honest, law abiding citizens.
I silently asked myself "What have we done so wrong to have failed so miserably as parents?' I remember the answer as clear as if it were today. 'You want to help people, how can you if you have
never walked in the footsteps of the hurting?' I have so often thought of that through the years. The truth of that statement holds so much
wisdom.. for in order to understand, show empathy, know what to
say and do.. OR not to say or do.. comes from having the experience
of walking those paths of turmoil and strife in our own life.
I remember a mother who proved the truth of this over and over. She had four children constantly causing problems with the school, the law,
you name it. I was named her advocate and I worked with her in
seeing how her children pushed her buttons and the result was never
good. Oh what an awesome time that was. I have thanked God over and over for the life He gave me. Karen and I shed so many tears
together, laughed together until our stomach hurts.. and it was all
because I had walked in her shoes. While my life has been hard,
it also has been so beautiful when you could feel and know the
heartache of another. I could never have helped those parents in
P.I.N... never been successful in the drug group.. never saw so
much growth in the kids while volunteering at school, never received
the reports from my Hospice patients when I volunteered, and never
been so successful in starting and watching our senior group thrive
here in our community.. never able to help those who have lived a life of abuse had I not lived through a life of sexual, verbal, physical, and oh so much emotional hurt at the hands of those who should have wanted to love me. Sweet Abba Father, thank You for all You have taught me through the valleys you forged for me. I can't help tho at times, like now, when I am hurting so much to wonder.... Why do you have to trust me so much? I wonder, but only for a short time for I
know after the hurt is over.. the rainbow will raise me to the height
of Your awesome glory!
organize a support team for parents with troubled teens.
It was called P.I.N, Parents in Need. The philosophy the group
used was 'Tough Love' I remember sitting there listening to the
heartbreaking stories of the hurts the parents had endured while
trying to raise their children to be Godly, honest, law abiding citizens.
I silently asked myself "What have we done so wrong to have failed so miserably as parents?' I remember the answer as clear as if it were today. 'You want to help people, how can you if you have
never walked in the footsteps of the hurting?' I have so often thought of that through the years. The truth of that statement holds so much
wisdom.. for in order to understand, show empathy, know what to
say and do.. OR not to say or do.. comes from having the experience
of walking those paths of turmoil and strife in our own life.
I remember a mother who proved the truth of this over and over. She had four children constantly causing problems with the school, the law,
you name it. I was named her advocate and I worked with her in
seeing how her children pushed her buttons and the result was never
good. Oh what an awesome time that was. I have thanked God over and over for the life He gave me. Karen and I shed so many tears
together, laughed together until our stomach hurts.. and it was all
because I had walked in her shoes. While my life has been hard,
it also has been so beautiful when you could feel and know the
heartache of another. I could never have helped those parents in
P.I.N... never been successful in the drug group.. never saw so
much growth in the kids while volunteering at school, never received
the reports from my Hospice patients when I volunteered, and never
been so successful in starting and watching our senior group thrive
here in our community.. never able to help those who have lived a life of abuse had I not lived through a life of sexual, verbal, physical, and oh so much emotional hurt at the hands of those who should have wanted to love me. Sweet Abba Father, thank You for all You have taught me through the valleys you forged for me. I can't help tho at times, like now, when I am hurting so much to wonder.... Why do you have to trust me so much? I wonder, but only for a short time for I
know after the hurt is over.. the rainbow will raise me to the height
of Your awesome glory!
I will be calling a local Christian ministry today that helps women and children in need to see if I can volunteer there.
You are right, we just need to change our viewpoint of our circumstances to an eternal perspective.
We all need to remember that God has a plan for us as we walk through this journey. I feel strongly in that as my DH and I walk through the cancer diagnosis he has.
I also do volunteer work and get so much reward from it. I do admit it is a struggle sometimes but God gets me moving.
Prayers for all of us on our journeys.
What an inspiring testimony! Your words touched a cord in my heart today! I definitely needed to be reminded of this myself! I have asked myself that question a lot over the years too in all my troubles with my dysfunctional family, both my family of origin and my ES..... why does rejection have to be the story of my life over and over??
I think we who were abused as kids especially dream of having that "Waltons kind of family" but then when we grow up and the dysfunction continues until we've lost our ES and GC in our senior years, we can let ourselves be deceived into thinking our lives did not amount to much to anyone.
But you are so right and I thank you from the bottom of my heart for reminding me of this favorite verse:
Gen 50:20 But as for you, ye thought evil against me; but God meant it unto good, to bring to pass, as it is this day, to save much people alive.
I certainly need to get out there and volunteer especially with the holidays coming. Turn our hearts outward. Yes, walking the path can help us help others. Thank yo uso much.
God bless us all as He uses us through these hard times of life.
May God be glorified in our trial.