That thought is true. Sadly, estrangement is a journey and it is hard. There are stages to the journey. Only God can change it because only God can change others. The word Accept has been a.difficult one for me. However, we never stop praying that one day our EC will turn to God's ways and back to family. God is always working. We pray in faith believing that He can do ALL things.

Absolutely - the only way to live. After I found this site and started going to a different church with such wonderful loving people, and praying differently - asking God to squeeze out the hate and anger in my ES and DIL and replace it with love and forgiveness -- then waiting on Him to make changes, my world seemed brighter and I was happier. It was very hard for me to "let go" and "let God".

We have not heard from our ES since a week ago when I brought my DH home from the hospital. We aren't worrying about it at all. If it is God's plan for ES and family to be part of our family, it will happen; otherwise, I will just continue to pray for them.

When my estrangement began, I thought that I would gladly die from the sadness I felt. Thanks to God, he lifted me up. I may never know the love of my ES and GC, but I have a Father watching over me and leading me on a different journey then I thought was my life.

As the estrangement journey continues it has become more and more clear how letting God work
is best. Many times we do not see Him working but He is always working things out for our best.

Norske, how is DH feeling? I hope he will hear from ES, soon (in God's timing).

Oh I can so relate to your post, my anxiety would build for days just knowing I would have to deal with her. By the time I got there, I was exhausted and in "fight or flight" mode the entire time. God thank you for relieving me of this. I couldn't take it anymore, the being ridiculed, belittled and treated like a slave and a doormat. How could I have allowed it for so long? Now she can talk all the trash she wants about me and I don't care. I am thankful for my peace and my loving family.

I am deciding right now if i should go and see my gc tomarrow my gd wont be there but my gs will.And i dont knowif es and dil will be there,my sister is there she lives there andmy dil parents just moved in a few wwks ago.I am not comfortable with situation.But i would like to see my gs but if i go tomarrow i feel guilty cause i wont see gd.And its been bout 5-6 wks since i saw them.And i dont want to have to makeanother trip next wk.Iam the typeof person iworry what people say bout me my anxiety is getting way up there.I know if something ever happened to my sister i would loose all contact with es and dil and there children.Cause my son really doesnt care if i see mygc or not i go see them andmake the effort for me cause i want to see them.

It sounds like you love to see your gc but with it comes a lot of anxiety and having to deal with unpleasant people. Please pray first to see if God is leading you to go. If He is He will give you the grace. If He is not ,although you would miss the gc, He will give you Peace.

I am still unsure about tomarrow.And feel like its becoming a dread,instead of a pleasure.If i want to talk to my sister we either have to go outside or talk infront of DIL parents.I am so tired of one day i am ok and one day more depressed.And really they dont care.Last time i spoke with ES was father day i called to wish him,Its funny how we care so deeply and get nothing in return.Sometimes i feel so all alone i dont want a pity party but i get very very sad.The joy is no longer there in my life.And i have often told DH i can see why some people commit suicide at least you have peace the hurt isnt there.But i knowitgoes against my beliefs.Idont think i would have the nerve but i can see why people do it.

The joy may not be there concerning our EC and no,sadly, we did not get back from them what we were hoping. The one thing is certain is that no other person can fill us. That includes the best husband or child. Only Jesus can satisfy. The other thing for sure is no one is worth hurting ones self over or shortening the life that God has given. Our life belongs to Him. Sometimes it is best to take a break from the contact that is causing so much pain and be kind to ourselves. God and time are the best Healers. Concentrating on other ministries will bring blessing and joy.

I agree with lindajoan. Going to see your GS when it is not filled with joy but is filled with anxiety is not good for your mental health. I am praying that you find relief from your depression. Take very good care of yourself. Blessings.

I remember when I didn't want to go to my ES's wedding; they wouldn't even allow us to go to the groom's dinner, which my DH tried to pay for and the check was returned and it was a new "secret'. But I did go and I am glad I did. My counsellor said if I didn't go, I would regret it and they would always hold it against me.

Will your husband go with you? I would probably go for a short time, visit with your sister just generically, hug your grandchild and then excuse yourself because you have another commitment.

But please pray about it first.

Although I would love to go see my GC, I know it probably won't happen. Then I will be hurt and depressed more than ever. All we can do is Trust in the Lord for He is our Rock and our Salvation. A mother's love is so deep and enduring that there is no way we can comprehend any of this. The best we can do is give it to God through all things are possible. God be with you and grand you His peace.

I spoke with my sister this morning and i will not go see anyone today cause i cant make another trip next wk to see other gd.So my DH and myself will go nxt wkend to see them.I explained to my sister i do not want to be put in a situation where my es says something in front of a houseful of people to me and DH and hurt me more than i am.So she says she understands andshe knows how he is.And ES may never say anything wrong but i cant riskmy emotions at this time.

If you feel led to make the trip then God will help you through it no matter what. Pray that no matter what anyone says that you will be able to handle it and react the way Jesus would. I hope it will be a blessed time for you. Enjoy the gc.

Lindajoan what you expressed was beautifully said.