Welcome to the group and I also have bipolar. I think that you sound like you are having Mixed Episode because typically even rapid cycling bipolar is four mood swings a year. Are you taking meds? They may not be working properly. Stress can also be a big factor with moods. I've been stable for a long time, but my father has been on death's door and I am really feeling it.

If you would like to friend me, maybe we can talk some more about this. In the meantime, I would like to pray for you.
"Heavenly Father I pray for this person who is struggling with mental illness. Please help and comfort them and help them to know you and that you are there in the midst of the struggle of life. In Jesus name I pray, Amen."

Thank you Angel. I have been going thru this rapid cycling for quite a while now. I am on meds and they are helping. Although many other things in my life are not helping right now. I lost my Dad suddenly last January, He was only 66 years old and recently had a full medical check up.That was very devistating to me. Then his mother past earlier this year, which was expected and was not as hard to deal with until one of my cousins talked about my Dad at grandma's funeral. Then all the emotions came running back to me.

I have a wonderful bride who has been helping deal with this, but we have so many other stresses to deal with as well.I work rotating 12 hour shifts and have been for the last 8 1/2 years, So my time with my family and alone time are limited. We have 3 wonderful childern, 2 girls and the oldest a boy.

Our boy got himself into so deep trouble earlier this year, something we have been dealing with for 6 years and could not get help with until now. He would not listen to anything he was told and would fight with us all the time. After he was sent in to be evaluated they think he has high functioning Asbergers. He has a higher than average IQ and did very well in school until the last 2 years. I blame myself for alot of this going bad for us because of my work and I was not the best at parenting when he was younger. I drove truck for his first 7 years. I was unable to bring him along except for a few times. I was home most weekends, but this didn't help alot since my bride had to do most of the raising of him. I spend as much time as possible with the kids as I can going to thier sports as much as possible and just spending time with them.

I end up with alot of stress dealing with all this and I don't think I have properly mourned the passing of my Father. I still have alot of trouble dealing with the loss of him. Adding the stress of counseling with my son, raising our daughters, stresses for work, and the everyday stress we all feel is driving me to the point of being almost unable to funtatoin some days. I feel wornout from the minute I get up until I lay down in the morning or night, depending on the shift I am working. I have other days that I get up refreshed and can crack jokes at work all day and then some of thoses days I can hardly take it have way through the shift. I may come off a set of nights and could sleep for 2 days if someone doesn't wake me up. I know because it has happened.

I pray for God's help in dealing with this and all my problems knowing He will never burden us with more then we can handle. And as I was taught by my parents growing up, just put it in God's hands and he will lead you down the right path to get thru what ever get in your path in life.

I want to thank you for your support and I am thankful for your prayers. God knows that I need his help and all the spport I can get to make it thru what He has let get in my path as I go thru this life.

Again thank you Angel,
Shrek 3

It may be that you aren't getting proper sleep working shift work. We bipolars need regular sleep cycles. Is there any way you can go to just a day shift or just a night shift? Also ck with your pdoc about your meds. You may need a tweek.

Yes, my pdoc tells me the number one issue for bp is to get enough sleep. I keep that as my goal, and it has been working for many years. I would also not be blaming yourself for what happened in the past with your kids. Think of some proactive ways to connect with them now. Hugs and God bless.

beckyp and Angela,

Thank you both for your help. I am unable to change to a straight shift due to the fact I work in the coal yard at a large power plant. We have to run 24/7 and the shifts were changed from rotating 8s to 12s a few years before I got there. Talking others I work with the 8s were even worse on the body and family time. I have cut back on my overtime to spend more time with my family and we try to spend as much time as possible with our son. We go fishing as a family and do other things together as much as possible.

I know sleep is very important and I am trying to get a regular amount each time i lay down. And try to catch up on my first day off. I also have cut back on staying over 4 hours when they ask us to if I have to work the next day.

I see my pdoc today and I will bring up what each of you have suggested and get her advice to go along with your input.

Thank you both,
Shrek

P.S. I have not been home alot because of work these past few days and I am soory it took so long to get back to you.