Cheaters Anonymous Community Group
This is a support group for cheating spouses looking for understanding and strength. Betrayed spouses are welcome to post ONLY if they can do so in a supportive manner (no bashing...these posts will be deleted), and please do not comment on 'Cheaters Only' posts.
On Monday, I had my appointment with my marriage counselor. My wife isn't going any more. It turns out that the other woman's husband is going to the same facility I am, because he saw me on my way in as he was on his way out. I didn't see him.
That evening, the other woman called me on the cell phone and told me that he had seen me and had gotten all mad at me (presumably because now I was invading his marriage counselor's office, even though I started there back in September). So, great... this guy is gunning for me again.
I only answered my phone because I had deleted her contact information from it and it came in with a generic ringtone and I didn't recognize her number.
So she asks me how I'm doing, and yes, my life is hell; she's having her own troubles and started talking about her tough time at work. All the kind of things that we shouldn't be talking about during Non-Contact. I told her how my bike ride along a trail here helped a lot and she was familiar with the trail but wasn't sure if I had ridden the whole thing. She suggested we walk it to see if I did the whole thing.
I told her "That's not going to happen!" She said it was good to hear my voice, and we ended the call. She tried to call back 10 minutes later, but I didn't answer.
I told my wife all about the call the next day. She believes the other woman is trying to worm her way back into my consciousness and life. A little bit at a time, the way she did before. That I should have prepared responses for the next time she tries, and that she will try again. I recognized that possibility.
We also agreed that the other woman's husband should know about this, because she violated the non-contact agreement.
I called him on Wednesday and he was receptive. Naturally the conversation was awkward and didn't quite go the way I had planned, but he got the gist of it. My wife assumes that he's checking her phone records, and if she deleted my call, that would show her continuing to mislead him. I left it in his hands as to whether to confront her with it or just take it under advisement. He thanked me.
I slept well that night.
That evening, the other woman called me on the cell phone and told me that he had seen me and had gotten all mad at me (presumably because now I was invading his marriage counselor's office, even though I started there back in September). So, great... this guy is gunning for me again.
I only answered my phone because I had deleted her contact information from it and it came in with a generic ringtone and I didn't recognize her number.
So she asks me how I'm doing, and yes, my life is hell; she's having her own troubles and started talking about her tough time at work. All the kind of things that we shouldn't be talking about during Non-Contact. I told her how my bike ride along a trail here helped a lot and she was familiar with the trail but wasn't sure if I had ridden the whole thing. She suggested we walk it to see if I did the whole thing.
I told her "That's not going to happen!" She said it was good to hear my voice, and we ended the call. She tried to call back 10 minutes later, but I didn't answer.
I told my wife all about the call the next day. She believes the other woman is trying to worm her way back into my consciousness and life. A little bit at a time, the way she did before. That I should have prepared responses for the next time she tries, and that she will try again. I recognized that possibility.
We also agreed that the other woman's husband should know about this, because she violated the non-contact agreement.
I called him on Wednesday and he was receptive. Naturally the conversation was awkward and didn't quite go the way I had planned, but he got the gist of it. My wife assumes that he's checking her phone records, and if she deleted my call, that would show her continuing to mislead him. I left it in his hands as to whether to confront her with it or just take it under advisement. He thanked me.
I slept well that night.
PinkPony - That's what I'm doing and intending to do. Sometimes she asks me questions that I simply don't have and answer for at the time. That's the down side of the good thing that we're talking again. She's starting to pressure me for all immediate solid answers again. The us against the world point is another one I've tried to make to her. Yeah, the world bloodied us up pretty bad, but together, as a team, we can stand.
My godness, TG is a sex therapist for my Bro! LOL!