Cheaters Anonymous Community Group
This is a support group for cheating spouses looking for understanding and strength. Betrayed spouses are welcome to post ONLY if they can do so in a supportive manner (no bashing...these posts will be deleted), and please do not comment on 'Cheaters Only' posts.
Hi guys
Like several of you I am struggling with NC. This week I started seeing a top notch therapist. He costs a chunk of money but I don't care my happiness is worth it.
Anyway after just one session I already feel (very very slightly) better. I understand a little more now.
I was going to ask if you wanted me to post the learnings from these sessions in this thread? It may also help you with your struggle. A simple yes or no is fine. If there are more yes than no responses then I'll write up yesterday's session and start with that for you.
Let me know and good luck to all of you.
Like several of you I am struggling with NC. This week I started seeing a top notch therapist. He costs a chunk of money but I don't care my happiness is worth it.
Anyway after just one session I already feel (very very slightly) better. I understand a little more now.
I was going to ask if you wanted me to post the learnings from these sessions in this thread? It may also help you with your struggle. A simple yes or no is fine. If there are more yes than no responses then I'll write up yesterday's session and start with that for you.
Let me know and good luck to all of you.
Take your time. We are here. When our past present and futures get rewritten-it is nothing short of hell.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8Klrc0YuikM
Thank you for sharing what you are learning.
You said:
GRIEF:
When a person works through grief, the first stage is denial. That's the one that I am in. When a person is in denial, they do things like re-read messages, with a skew towards seeing what THEY want to see in those messages. Also when a person is in denial, they refuse to believe that it is over, and they look for signs that the "relationship" is still "alive". They constantly wait for messages, agonise over when to send and when to reply, and when she will message. This is all the denial stage of the grief cycle. It is important for the person in grief to realise this, THE IMPORTANT THING IS FEEL AND WORK THROUGH THE PAIN because that is what helps you develop the skills to move ahead.
WOW! I thought I was the only one who was acting this way after my OM said it was over. I was like you, we were in constant contact all the time. Now I have been feeling crazy, like I have no control over my actions! I feel lost, and just want to reach out to him, even to find out why. I am checking my email several times an hour. BLAH! This can't be healthy. Add to this the guilt and shame, and the realization that what I thought I did for love, was a huge sacrifice for nothing but pain. My own fault, but doesn't take away the pain.
What does it mean to feel and work through the pain?? I want to gain the skills to move ahead.