Maybe you should end it.

seriously, have some restraint.

get out of the bubble that just coz they cant see you two fucking, I assume you might be, they wouldnt think it.

it is the subtle differences in how we act that give us away. you CANT let your guard down if youre doing something like this! if youre serious about getting this on, be serious in hiding it

wow, psycho, rough. Had i realized i was so transparent i wouldn't have acted that way. Kinda hard to hide it when you are excited about someone. I guess you would do better.

While you may not realize how obvious your have been, I am willing to bet people have it all figured out. I say this because I got warning after warning from friends and even my boss. You would think that would have woken me up, but no. I was having too much fun and thought I was in love.

Your husband probably suspects but doesn't want to know because knowing forces him to face it.

True what red says. H probably suspects. I truly believe my H suspected bc it is hard to live a double life and hide your feelings especially when you're so happy and think you're in love. The thing is, if you want to work on your M, you have to end the A. You can't have both. Many of us here have realized that and thats why - either by getting caught or ending it ourselves - we are doing what needs to be done. It is NOT easy! But that's why we're here to help and support each other since we're at different points in our journeys, we can get advice from different perspectives. Your H probably doesn't want to know for sure and confirm his suspicions because that would devastate him. If you end the A of your own free will and it happens to come out later, it may help your H a little bit knowing you made a mistake, realized it, and stopped it.

Hugs to u :)

look, lets face it... most of the time all we hear is the sweety romanticized comment. but sometimes, we just have to hear it for what it is.

i know youre excited, but you can lose things playing with this, not me.

and the thing is, when it does blow... you cant just make excuses. it can be game over instantly you know. tread carefully.

It does sound like he's catching on, maybe not to the whole play but at the very least he's feeling that there's a threat that he has to counter. He may think he's caught this in the nick of time, that he can nip it in the bud before you go too far.

To me, the worst form of abuse is gas lighting. We all need to be able to trust our own perceptions in order to feel safe in the world. To take that from someone is a special form of cruelty. He has his suspicions and at some point he's likely to ask questions. If he's asking it's because he's searched his own heart and determined that he can handle the truth. When this time comes, give it to him.

I know that sounds scary as hell but anything less is beyond unkind. It's easier to forgive cheating than to forgive that crazy making shit. I was sure my H would leave me when he learned of my A but 3 years later he's still here. If I had lied to him and made him feel like he was imagining things, I don't think he'd be around.