Cheaters Anonymous Community Group
This is a support group for cheating spouses looking for understanding and strength. Betrayed spouses are welcome to post ONLY if they can do so in a supportive manner (no bashing...these posts will be deleted), and please do not comment on 'Cheaters Only' posts.
Hi all,
Tell me something.
What is the point of 'block and delete' when you've memorised their g**d***ed mobile phone number?
I tried. God knows I tried. About three million times. Blocked, and deleted. Unblocked, and un-deleted. Rinse and repeat, rinse and repeat. Over and over and over. Sometimes 10 times a day. Tried my hardest. I just can't. I can't.
Also.. we were always on whatsapp. I tried everything in my power to not look at his profile, at 'last online', to not assume that 'online' means anything for me. (I'm assuming posters here are familiar with whatsapp). I'm 48. Last time I dated, 14 years ago, none of this nonsense existed. I don't know how to deal with 'last online' and 'online'. Oh my god lord I'd give anything in this world to see 'typing' again, but that will never happen.
I know I'm in denial. I know I'm a moron.
I've had a couple of beers.. numbed the pain for an hour or so. I'm going to have a few more. Then, I'm going to wake up tomorrow morning and it will hit me again. Like a damn skyskraper falling on top of me suffocating me.
I cannot cope with this.
I’ve been here. Lord have I been here. My journal entries from 4 years ago are.. here. I fell in “love” in the most devastatingly painful form. We were in love within a week and getting matching tattoos after a month of knowing each other. He consumed my EVERY thought and I was 100% planning our run into the sunset. When he ghosted me, I wanted to die. Thankfully, I found my buddies here.
Cut to today: after years of coldly brushing off my attempts to reach out and the excruciating healing process, he passive aggressively reached out to me on social media 2 years ago. For the past 2 years, we’ve on and off talked. We’ve broken off contact for months at a time, only to eventually circle back. Every damn time.
My point: THEY ALWAYS COME BACK. They absolutely do. Your goal should be to get to a place where when he does, you can tell him to F off.
It ain’t easy. I’ll never be able to do it. The affair of a lifetime has you for just that, a lifetime.
I went NC and loved her horribly wanted to marry her... but I was the BS.
I knew in order to heal i had to go NC.
But she still contacts me over 3 months since i ended it.