Caring For Aging Parents Support Group
Caring for aging parents can be a difficul time as we become the caretakers for our parents. This broad responsibility can encompass such services as assisted living, adult day care, long term care, nursing homes, hospice care, and in-home care. Whether you have just started caring for your parents or just need a place to talk, we're here.
I'm trying not to. And it probably won't happen, but if mom makes herself sick and I cant go on vacation. I will resent her. She cant sleep and her blood pressure is going up high. She is on several blood pressure meds. She is being sued as owner of commercial property that didnt pay complete bill or any money to firm fixing property from fire. Because they did it wrong. Inspector said job has to be redone. Brother lives with her but he is little help. He has personality disorder. I have been trying to reasure her for months. That I'll wory about brother and help financially when she is dead. She is upset that between lawyer and what company is suing for ther wont be much money left. She wants money for brother to pay home expences when she dies. Won't accept that home will have to be sold. Brother wants to live in home.
I have to accept that her choices have and may keep impacting my life negatively. Any ways to do it?
Barbara
I have to accept that her choices have and may keep impacting my life negatively. Any ways to do it?
Barbara
that's a lot.
Is there a particular reason you cannot go on vacay if your mother "makes herself sick"? She is under a lot of stress, but so are you. Is there a way to go on your vacation? How long will you be gone and what will she need, exactly? Because, speaking from experience, I would soooo love a vacay from my self-defeating mom. And everything else, for that matter!
Accept that she'll her choices have negative consequences, but maybe try to find ways to minimize their impact on your life if you can? Find out how many of her legal and financial issues will be yours and your brother's, if any? I find that asking "What if?" and answering it (no matter how bizarre my answers get!) .... helps me find answers on how to cope with stuff.
Luck and blessing.
The hearing is tomorrow, and I suspect that a lot of the unknowns, but not all of them, will resolve at that time.
The only thing I can think to say at this time is to warn the lawyer that your mother is very scared and may do something rash.
Continuing hugs