Nope. just might make the symptoms show up more.

Dementia is a symptom where as Alzheimers is a disease.

Dementia is a behavior, and like other behaviors it can be "learned", it can be the result of physical illness. We have also heard here that it can be caused by UTIs.

As for it being caused by something like Alzheimer, that is going to happen no matter where our parent lives.

I would guess that a manipulative person can "talk them self" into dementia like symptoms much like a teenager making them self depressed if they don't get the car they want for their 18th birthday.

Your mom has been manipulative of you and your brother, and I can totally see her throwing a hissy fit and acting all dementia like.

Hi Diane M,
So sorry you are going through this. Ihave been on and off this site since both of my parents have passed, one in March and the other in April. Anyway, as far as changing the place a parent lives as a cause of dementia, I would think not, HOWEVER, being an former ICU nurse and seeing how patents react to a changing environment, I have to say that they may present this way. People get used to their environment and with age they get more and more set in their routines and surroundings. Moving them may change their behavior. It was only one month after a move, (a good one) for them, mom passed and dad followed one month later. Moving puts an unbelievable amount of stress on the aging, but sometimes there are no good options. That is what I told myself and my father. Sorry. This stuff is just so hard. Hugs

my daughter is an OT and one of her rotations was in a lock down facility for older folks with dementia (to keep them from wandering out)...she told me about good things in the place, with music and exercise therapy. some folks, too far along...were kept during the day up by the nurses desk to have them 1. kept an eye on and 2. so they would overhear conversations and not just stay in beds all day.
While some of these situations may not look ideal, they are certainly better than letting someone wander in the community and be unsafe.
OF course a move could be unsettling; and when my mom gets nervous, she tends to be demanding and not be able to pay attention. those changes are not permanent. I wonder, however, if someone was depressed from a move if it could have them act even more demented.
So, unless your doctors tell you that....I call false.

I ask because i have been having some odd conversations with mom...more odd than usual. She has an appointment with her doctor and was talking about how she has not been there in 19 years. I informed her that it has only been 6 months since her last appointment and i know this because i have always been her ride. Her mind just seemed more sharp when she was at home.

My MIL has made it clear that she does NOT want to go to a nursing home. When assisted living was damn near mandatory after her serious shoulder breaking fall she threw a fit. All her kids (4 of them) united to tell her that she had to go, and that they would bring her home when she was able to take care of her activities of daily living.

She did not like it one bit. She became very sad and depressed there, she called it "jail" and "her prison".

I know that if they put her in a home again her mental outlook would deteriorate much like you are saying about your mother. I believe that in my MIL's case it would be a case of "self induced foul mood begets all sorts of other behavioral issues".

My guess is that might be what is going on with your mother. She does not want to be there, and as a result she is throwing her version of a temper tantrum.

Gentle hugs

Ok. Let's "talk turkey."

Getting old sucks.

Not being able to care for one's self in one's own home sucks.

Caring for aging parents sucks!

But ya know what? it is part of life and nothing can ever change that.

Guilt and remorse over what can't be controlled is a huge waste of time, Don't let it suck the life out of you.

well i am happy to say i am not feeling a whole lot of guilt anymore over her placement. Trying to keep her at home would have involved more than I am capable of..both physically and mentally.

You're absolutely right there Diane, there comes a time when you have to let go of the guilt. When the time comes when our parents are not able to take care of themselves and it becomes apparent that their living conditions are a safety issue, it's time to get them somewhere where they will be taken care of. If you cant' take care of them at home yourself, you have to let go of the guilt. It's the responsible thing to do getting them somewhere where they're safe and sound.

So happy you are feeling better about things Lady Di!