Caring For Aging Parents Support Group
Caring for aging parents can be a difficul time as we become the caretakers for our parents. This broad responsibility can encompass such services as assisted living, adult day care, long term care, nursing homes, hospice care, and in-home care. Whether you have just started caring for your parents or just need a place to talk, we're here.
I feel like I've had it. As soon as one situation improves a bit ther is something else to worry about. I said to myself this morning I wish I could kill myself. I would never do it. It wouldn't be fair to my husband.
The good news first. I worked out a signal with mom. Now I can call her. Hang up and she will call me back. That is big improvement. She seems to be in a little less pain. Her injury must me getting better. There is a physical therapist comming to the house now. Three times a week. I think she recomened that mom go to shoulder doctor? If therapy doesnt work.
The bad is that I got all worked up about probable snow storm comming to mom an my area. She has food. But brother probably left shouvel ouside, and someone took it. Probably doesnt have ice melter. Last storm by the time he went to buy stuff everything was gone. Worring about mom power going off. Storm to startFriday. It's very hard for me to drive up there during the week. I'm very anxious. And there is too much traffic during the week. Its an hour and a half trip. So I'm not going up there to bring her supplies. Then Sunday night I got an alert from the bank. Moms online account passcode was changed. It saiid the last time the online account was accessed was begining of December. Ichecked and no large amounts of money have been transfered to another bank. But I cant talk to brother to see if he set up an online account. Last few phonecalls withmom. I could hear him scream ing in the background. Mom andbrother are very upset right now. Cant talk tobrother. Afraid he will get physical and throw something that will hit mom or puthis hand on her and shake her or something. And as much pain as she is in and her injury Idont want to make worse. I'm sick of mom andbrother. Wish I didn't feel responcible.
Barbara
The good news first. I worked out a signal with mom. Now I can call her. Hang up and she will call me back. That is big improvement. She seems to be in a little less pain. Her injury must me getting better. There is a physical therapist comming to the house now. Three times a week. I think she recomened that mom go to shoulder doctor? If therapy doesnt work.
The bad is that I got all worked up about probable snow storm comming to mom an my area. She has food. But brother probably left shouvel ouside, and someone took it. Probably doesnt have ice melter. Last storm by the time he went to buy stuff everything was gone. Worring about mom power going off. Storm to startFriday. It's very hard for me to drive up there during the week. I'm very anxious. And there is too much traffic during the week. Its an hour and a half trip. So I'm not going up there to bring her supplies. Then Sunday night I got an alert from the bank. Moms online account passcode was changed. It saiid the last time the online account was accessed was begining of December. Ichecked and no large amounts of money have been transfered to another bank. But I cant talk to brother to see if he set up an online account. Last few phonecalls withmom. I could hear him scream ing in the background. Mom andbrother are very upset right now. Cant talk tobrother. Afraid he will get physical and throw something that will hit mom or puthis hand on her and shake her or something. And as much pain as she is in and her injury Idont want to make worse. I'm sick of mom andbrother. Wish I didn't feel responcible.
Barbara
If you ever suspect that your brother is physically abusive towards your mother then I would change those living arrangements quickly.
If you see large amounts of monies transferred out of her account, then I would address it with her. It just may be that she's given your brother access to it. I'm just guessing here but all these things are fixable. Just try not to worry so much about something that might or could happen. You'll just exhaust yourself.
My recommendation for you is try your best to not to think of all the
what if's...
You can only do the best that you can do from where you are. Try to think and stay positive. It's normal to be concerned about your mom. It shows that you really do care and if you can change things, you would immediately.
Right now, believe that she's going to be fine during the storm. If you know any of the neighbors, maybe reaching out to them to check on her will help. If you don't know any, the next time you go visit, meet a few nearby neighbors and exchange numbers.
Believe that everything is going to be okay. As much as we would like to have the power to control everything & make it all work out our way. Somethings are meant for us to let go and trust others.
Praying for you, your mom and brother.
Blessings to you,