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Man dying, Wife Crying LOST and Alone

Bluerows02
Bluerows02
My abuser's father inlaw has end stage Parkinsons's Disease and dementia. He is getting progressively worse this year but it still is slow moving in comparison to life aspects of dignity, heartache and pain. His wife of 42 has no one to help her. SO I decided as I have her only grandson and got her son in prison for 6 six years due to abuse that I would offer to move in and help. This is destroying me. Watching death and then seeing his wife without remorse angry and yelling all the time. WHat am I to do>
HCARD
HCARD
No question here, MOVE OUT. You don't owe them anything. You have traded one abuser for another. Take care of you and your son, no one else.
Bluerows02
Bluerows02
I know right, it seems so easy. But it isn't easy. Nothing is easy/ Financially I can't afford to move right now, also by moving I was able to return to school fulltime to get a better job for me and my son so that I will never have to rely on the POS ever. Then I see that she suffers but just expresses it differently, SHe gets mad I cry. The old man, is half with it and hqalf not, but has become agressive and began hitting and choking ect.... He is sedated but even that doesn't seem to work. I have so much guilt about the humanity aspect of him alone/ so much pain from living in the devils den and so much need to not fail at this or else everything I have tried to rebuild will be lost.
blueviolet725
blueviolet725
I would have to move into a homeless shelter or go insane. that sounds like HELL.
Yes, I get that there is something in it for you...but at what cost?
And does your kid live with you?
I wouldn't want kids to see that, learn that, or be that.

make a plan. do something fast.
HCARD
HCARD
Blue I went to catholic school and had a nun who had many wise sayings. One was " if you can't find a way out or a solution to a problem. Get new glasses and listen carefully." Stop reacting and start thinking and planing. Can you get her to stop yelling, get free in home help from SS, contact the Parkinson's association, get meals on wheels etc. Hugs
Bluerows02
Bluerows02
It's not that I am not reading your responses or have considered all the issues associated with this environment. But my heart wants to be here. I can't explain it.
HCARD
HCARD
No,no I didn't mean you weren't reading the responses. If your heart tells you to stay that is different. Just make sure you are taking care of yourself and your son. You have both been though a lot.
deenamom
deenamom
Hugs. I hear how hard this is for you. I pray you will have wisdom, provision and strength.
willowangel
willowangel
Dear Blue, have you considered that you are raising your wonderful son under another abusers roof? You need to take care of YOU so you can take care of him. You now know that it was a mistake to think that this situation could work out. Is there anyone that can take you and your son in for a short period of time until you can figure things out?

I am sure that you and you son would be better offf sleeping on someones sofa then live in dysfunction.