I'm not a counsellor, but I've walked away from careers and it looks like I'm about to do it again. I find all jobs drain you then throw you away. That's the way it is now. No loyalty.

Sounds like you're doing the right thing. The new job may bring more hours and all jobs have stress, but you'll have a different challenge and this will probably help with the burnout.

Good luck

I rarely even check this group, tends not to be that active, but I'm glad I looked! I don't exactly have any answers but I do find myself in a similar position. I've also trained for many years to do counseling. I had a good job and have also had to walk away due to personal issues. Unlike your situation, my supervisor was supportive but wasn't able to work with me when I needed to at least reduce my hours during a rocky stretch.

Recently I ended up interviewing for something (a very bizarre set of circumstances - I wasn't even looking for an interview)/ I was offered that job but had to turn it down, which broke my heart because it was pretty wonderful. As I said, I'm still a little shaky, I have some family issues that require my being around. I think some jobs are easier to transition into than others, though it's always stressful. This one would have been huge.

So far I'm treading water. We're in different countries, I think, and I don't know about where you are but here these jobs are fairly hard to find. Right now I'm doing something completely different to keep myself afloat. No real idea what happens next.

Thank you both so very much for your replies.

I find that this whole season of my life has really shaken me to the core, affecting my sense of purpose and causing me to really question a lot of things including career direction. I don't know if quitting was pulling away through immense emotions, or about an intuitive push for change.

Feels like I am anxiously floating about and my sense of feeling connected and calm is demolished. I wake up each day thinking that I want to disappear and with failure, and that is just not right.

At the moment I'm trying not to fall into that place of 'regret' as can easily happen in these kind of situations and also trying to pursue a sense of asserting my self. It's easy to question yourself when you don't feel stable and that's what I am battling with terribly.

I see now all those benefits and love and community that I had in my previous job and how fear, grief, overwhelm and compassion fatigue or burnout drove me away stemming from a place of guilt - not spending more time with mum apart from work as she was dying.

I am waking up every morning with dread and can feel myself slipping into depression over this. The thing is that we've so much to be thankful for and it's easy to lose perspective when you lose sense of control and life purpose.

I really need someone who understands the depth of my personal struggle and can help keep me focused and moving along on the right path. That person was always my mother, but since she is not longer here in physical form, I am more than ever needing this. I know I am loved, as I'm certain you both are also and this can be our strength.

It's hard not to feel like a burden to others so I'll reconnect with my counsellor, but I really need some others in my life that can relate with like yourselves even if it is over dailystrength or email in this transition of career (it's such a huge deal to me as i've explained above).

Rsnation you have a point when you say that you're keeping yourself afloat - and I suppose sometimes it's just about that when your resources feel drained.

I hope that a new challenge will serve as a distraction, I just hope I am up for the challenge as I'm far from my 'true and stable' self at the moment.. so anxious and fearful not really understanding my own needs.

I wish you both luck and peace and again thank you for listening to my cry.

xoxo

Well a lot can happen in a short space of time. Like big life decisions..

I was offered another job and have to lock my decision in my tomorrow! (thursday 27th Feb)

It's a compliment that I got two offers, but now comes the crunch. I've said yes to one but haven't signed anything. I can't do both because working 6 days a week is just not healthy.

I am weighing up the pros and cons and would appreciate your thoughts should they come in time :)

Support role;
- Close to home which i like but a role i'm unsure of and brand new to (so unsure of fit)
- Full time but I'd really prefer part time and struggle with full time grind
- One year contract, no promise of work when that ends but may move around in the agency who knows
- Older clientele, and travelling to their homes at times which I do not like to do as it makes me uncomfortable
- Training groups in a topic that I'm not fully confident in - mostly because I haven't done it before though
- Constant flow of cash due to hours
- Routine provided, to serve as a distraction from my grief perhaps

Counselling role;
- 3 hours travel per day but a role I'm used to a bit and trained for
- Heavy role, counselling cancer related issues but with a clientele I enjoy 12-24 years
- Part time, which gives me time out on the other days
- No end date at this point in time, being it doesn't appear to be a contract job
- Extra pay if I work one day on a weekend should i choose to but this may clash with my volunteer work and time with husband
- Could lead to other jobs in my trained area/industry should I wish to remain counselling

The main reason why I left my last job;
- Need for change
- Was feeling burnt out and anxious, a little bored
- Isolated in my role and no room for debriefing, almost ever
- I needed to re-assert and empower myself
- I resented the fact that it took time away from me and my ill mother who passed away from aggressive cancer
- I don't want to work anymore and have lost my interest in going to work or passion.. but that's not realistic or a healthy attitude. My anxiety is also playing a role to this.

Sounds like you'll enjoy the second job better. Good luck. It's nice to have a choice, but challenging to decide.

Thanks for your response Truhal.

Decision time!!!!...............

I took the one close to home, full time, to get a break from counselling.
You see I felt that working with people on cancer related issues would be a big trigger for me having recently lost my mum to this and I've also developed an anxiety/stress response physically to all the stress in my life over the past year. I really need to shake this.. so a low stress job is my ultimate goal right now. I only hope that the one I chose is this.

Also I told the counselling job/place that I would consider working with them in future, and opt for casual work on a weekend every now and then if they like. This way I have a foot in the door in the case I'd like to return to counselling. I told them it bottled down to a practical choice of close to home versus far away because - well - that was a big deal to me! 3 hours a day of travel is yucky to me.

PHEW! Now I just need to transition and I realise with full time hours and a role thats new and therefore way out of my comfort zone it's going to be a challenge! But I'm told it's a fairly low stress job so will see how we go.

I hope I made the right choice..

Almost 9 months later... Definitely made the right choice to walk away from the high stress job. And that is that :)

So glad it's working out for you. Thanks for letting us know too. I like hearing a happy ending.

Since you posted this, I've resigned from three jobs. I had one for nearly 8 years. The second and third job I quit after two weeks. I'm semi-retired and will come out for the right job, but I'm no longer willing to kiss butts and take a job with high stress. One job I quit after I found out my blood pressure was soaring from the stress. I literally went out for lunch, stopped at a store and took my blood pressure, went back to work and quit. I gave no notice.

Now, I'm a temp and plan to keep it that way. Low pay, but no stress. The way I see it, stress brings medical bills. You end up making tons of money and giving it to your doc who spends it on golf courses and vacations. No thanks!