I had so many psychological problems when I was a teenager tnat it is quite a sad strory.
My Mom had no idea how to help me although she tried her best. I had brain damage from a car accident and was having seizures that are very hard to detect.

My self-esteem was non exisistant. I became involved with a man about four years older than me. We had sex only becuase it made him act like he cared for me.
I becme so out of control that my Mom gave me a choice: quit seeing this guy or get married. Well I got married a few months before my 27th birthday.
It didn't take long after we were married that he really started abusing me. It starte off as small things. I couldn't go out of the apartment without him. I couldn't have any male friends. When he went out, I had to stay home. And then it was pushing and shoving. Then he would start and argument and threaten me.
I remember the first time he said he was going to 'spank' me I looke him in the eye and said, "You wouldn't dare!"
Boy was I wrong! After that he began to slap me anytime I voiced my oppinion. Then I couldn't have any friends at all. I couldn't see my family unless he went with me.
Oh my God! How could I have made such a mistake? How could I have done something so stupid?
I had already dropped out of school. How could I go back and face everyone?
How could I admit to my Mom that I had made such a terrible mistake?
My life had ended at seventeen. I had done it to myself. Did I deserve happiness? I told him that I wanted to go home and he told me that he would kill me first. Actually what he told me was: "I'll take you out to the wildlife refuge where no one can hear you scream. I will have a cage full of rats. After I tie you on the ground with no clothes; I will make little cuts all over your body. Then I might even drip a little honey on you. Now mind you, these rats will not have been fed for a few days, so they will be really hungry. And then I will let them out one at a a time every forty-five minutes. And if I cant get to you I will get to your Mom!"
Now I must tell you that my dad was in Korea. And he had been abusive, so there would be no help there. So I was stuck. Eventually, he was discharged from the military with and undesireable discharge and we moved from Oklahoma to San Antonio. While there he raped me and I became pregnant. He continued to hit me while I was pregnant.
When my daughter was born, I was terrified. I might have felt that I was worthless, but my baby was not! He continued to hit me. But then he hit my six month old daughter. Well that was it! I waited until he went to work. I packed and hid my bag under the bed. He came home for lunch. I fed him. He asked my what was for dinner and I said a pot roast. When he left, I waited for half an hour just to make sure he would not come back. And then I went to a battered womens shelter. When were were divorce, his abuse was found to be so bad that he was not allowed to see our daughter without being supervised.
My second husband just couldnt handle all my baggage and we soon divorce. So we wont go there.
My third husband, that I am with now. He married me a few years after I had checked into a mental health facility and began treatment for my seizures and depression. He knew coming into the relationship about my past and problems.
When we frist married he started telling me that I couldnt walk out in the country any more. I couldn't have any male friends. He didnt want me driving by myself. It all felt way too familiar. The pattren was way too familiar. I couldn't let this happen agian!
One day we were arguing and he put his hands with in an inch of my throat and said, "Don't you know that I could just snap your neck?!"
And in that moment of clarity I began to see the difference. I put my hand on my hip and looked him square in the eye and said,
"Sure you could. But you love me too much to do that." Well, that did it . His shoulders slumped, the wind went out of him, he hung his head and turned around and walked away mumbling to himself. It took almost two years for us to work things out. I had come to understand that it wasn't that he wanted me isolated, it was that the thought of anything happening to me scared the hell out of him. He would do anything to protect me from myslef. Let me be clear. We yelled, we screamed, we said hurtful things to each other. But never once did he try to keep me from my family or my girlfriends. He was just scared for me. It was an amazing insight to see that the only time he yelled was when he was afraid.
Over the years, we learned each other. We grew to respect each other and we have come to an understanding. There is a difference between abuse and protectiveness.
I had been on my own for so long with my seizures, and having to work on my own car becuase I couldnt afford a mechanic that it was hard to let go of some of my independence. I hope this story helps some of you see the difference. And see the signs early. Before you go through what I went through.